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Foods That Reduce Post-Workout Pains

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[caption id="attachment_830863" align="alignleft" width="1068"] Bigstockphoto.com/The lower body of a sitting African American woman holding a basket of fruit.[/caption] Being in pain after a workout feels a bit insulting. You dragged your butt out of bed, put on your (overpriced) workout clothes, drove to the gym and endured the heavy breathing of that one guy who always uses the treadmill next to yours to be in pain after? That doesn’t seem fair. Shouldn’t you be rewarded with a foot rub and a smoothie after every workout? Fine, maybe that’s overdoing it. But it doesn’t seem right that you can barely move for two days after your workout. And it isn’t right. The aches and pains you feel after hitting the gym hard could be the result of nutritional imbalances happening in your body. Remember, your body needs very different things when you’re exercising versus when you’re just sedentary. Here are foods that reduce post-workout aches. [caption id="attachment_700485" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Cruciferous veggies

If you’re heading back to the kitchen after hitting the gym, cook up some broccoli, spinach, celery or chard. These cruciferous veggies eliminate free radicals in the body that can hinder the healing process. They also boost metabolism.             [caption id="attachment_615091" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Watermelon

Not only is it hydrating, which you need after a workout, but watermelon also restores muscle glycogen—which your body converts into energy for your entire body, including your central nervous system. This fruit also boosts nitric oxide which helps repair damaged tissue.     [caption id="attachment_830865" align="alignleft" width="420"] Bigstockphoto.com/Overhead View of Roasted Soy Nuts in a Ceramic Bowl. Soy nuts are made from soybeans soaked in water drained and then baked or roasted. They can be used in place of nuts and are high in protein and dietary fiber. The image is a cut out isolated on a white[/caption]

Soy nuts

If you cram your workout in between meetings and picking up the kids from school, you need a food that won’t go bad in your gym bag. Soy nuts fit the bill, and a small handful contains a ton of protein that helps build muscle.                 [caption id="attachment_707049" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

White rice

While you usually want brown rice for its high fiber content, you want fast-digesting carbohydrates after working out. You’ll find that in white rice. Pair it with a protein like chicken for a complete post-workout meal.             [caption id="attachment_718714" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Whey protein

Branched-chain amino acids (otherwise known as BCAAs) encourage protein synthesis and can minimize muscle damage. BCAAs are found in high quantities in whey protein, which is why it’s such a popular ingredient in fitness drinks.               [caption id="attachment_707059" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Potatoes

Potatoes may not be fancy but they’re quite nutritionally complete. They have carbs and several other nutrients your body craves after a workout. If white potatoes aren’t your thing, you can have sweet potatoes.             [caption id="attachment_716706" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Quinoa

Quinoa provides a burst of protein and carbs. It’s also loaded with tons of amino acids, magnesium, potassium and calcium. Don’t let this ancient food fool you; it’s powerful.               [caption id="attachment_713119" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Kiwi and pineapple

Both of these tropical fruits improve your blood antioxidant levels and can greatly relieve pain. They’re also hydrating and boast vitamin C—your body needs a little immunity boost after a workout.             [caption id="attachment_617473" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Eggs

If your stomach doesn’t respond well to weigh protein don’t worry because eggs also contain plenty of BCAAS. They also take minutes to whip up, so you can get them in your post-workout system fast.         [caption id="attachment_722741" align="alignleft" width="365"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Cherry juice

Tart cherry juice contains anti-inflammatory compounds that act like painkillers. They can cut back on your Ibuprofen use.           [caption id="attachment_830882" align="alignleft" width="420"] Bigstockphoto.com/Chocolate Milk close up shot for background[/caption]

Chocolate milk

Good news! You have an excuse to return to this favorite childhood treat. Chocolate milk contains protein, calcium, and carbs.               [caption id="attachment_718719" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Bananas

Being in pain after a workout feels a bit insulting. You dragged your butt out of bed, put on your (overpriced) workout clothes, drove to the gym and endured the heavy breathing of that one guy who always uses the treadmill next to yours to be in pain after? That doesn’t seem fair. Shouldn’t you be rewarded with a foot rub and a smoothie after every workout? Fine, maybe that’s overdoing it. But it doesn’t seem right that you can barely move for two days after your workout. And it isn’t right. The aches and pains you feel after hitting the gym hard could be the result of nutritional imbalances happening in your body. Remember, your body needs very different things when you’re exercising versus when you’re just sedentary. Here are foods that reduce post-workout aches. [caption id="attachment_698583" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]  

Orange juice

Orange juice also has potassium—a little secret many people don’t realize. Rather than drinking your OJ first thing in the morning, save it for after your workout.               [caption id="attachment_622861" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Salmon

The healthy fats found in salmon, and most fish, reduce muscle soreness. If you’re in a hurry, keep canned salmon and crackers on hand.         [caption id="attachment_828443" align="alignleft" width="420"] Bigstockphoto.com/Chicken Satay; barbecued skewered chicken shown on white plate with peanut dipping sauce on the side.[/caption]

Chicken

Lean protein is the perfect post-workout dinner. It helps repair the muscle proteins broken during your workout, without putting your body through the work of digesting fattier meats like steak.               [caption id="attachment_616238" align="alignleft" width="434"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Nut butter

Nut butter has healthy fats, which, as we already know, can treat muscle soreness. It also has protein to repair damaged muscles and is easy to travel to the gym and work with.               [caption id="attachment_695084" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Coffee

Coffee has the obvious benefit of giving you an energy kick after a workout. But coffee can also block specific receptors in your body that cause an inflammatory response.               [caption id="attachment_696894" align="alignleft" width="421"] Shutterstock.com/crackers[/caption]

Salty crackers

The sodium in salty crackers replenishes the electrolytes you lost through sweating. If ever you wanted an excuse to have this otherwise not-so-healthy snack, this is it.                 [caption id="attachment_695106" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Milk (if tolerated)

If chocolate milk is too sweet for you, you can also drink plain milk. It has water, protein, and sodium—all of which your muscles crave after a workout.               [caption id="attachment_699544" align="alignleft" width="421"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Berries

The darker the berry, the better. Think blackberries and blueberries. These contain high amounts of antioxidants, which can repair damaged muscles.  

The post Foods That Reduce Post-Workout Pains appeared first on MadameNoire.


Christianity Is Not An Excuse To Let People Walk All Over You

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Scrolling Facebook is a part of my morning routine after hitting the the snooze button several times, trying to recall the dream I had, and thanking God for another day. Recently, a Facebook friend posted a status asking the question Can a person be too nice? I immediately had a comment to post, but I paused for a few minutes and tried to give someone else the opportunity. For one, I know that the woman who posed the question is generally a pleasant person. From other things she’s posted, I can see she’s a bit naive and wants everyone to like her.

Several minutes passed by and still no one commented–that was my green light to post.  Yes. Some people set no boundaries and wonder why they get used, I wrote. She liked my comment and agreed that setting boundaries was important and that she had been asking God to help her do better in that area. So obviously, one can conclude that her “being nice” often ends up with her being taken advantage of.  Then all of a sudden, her other Facebook friends started to chime in on the conversation. Sidebar: Is it just me, or do people purposely have no opinion or feedback on something until AFTER they see you comment? This happens to me all the time! Anyway, here comes the sudden interest in the great debate of being “too nice.”

Several people agreed that yes, there is such a thing as being too nice simply because we don’t know how to say “no.” I can definitely relate to that and learned a long time ago that saying no does not make me a heartless person. However, there was an influx of women who felt that as Christians one should never care about being taken advantage of, because vengeance is the Lord’s. So ultimately, they felt there was no such thing as being  “too nice” because God will take care of the people who misuse you.

Those same people on her post hollering about let God handle it would not say that if someone hacked their PayPal account. They would be on the phone with the bank trying to nab the thief. God can literally handle everything, but we pick and choose what we want to go tit for tat with all the time. Stop playing!

As a Bible believer I know that God wants us to impart wisdom in everything we do. The Bible also talks about the importance of not being a fool. Saying ‘yes’ to a person’s every want and request does not make me a nice or good person. I think it would be foolish of me to keep loaning money to a co-worker who never pays me back and rationalizing it with “vengeance is the Lord’s.” That’s like the equivalent of not wearing a seat belt because I have excellent car and health insurance! No, we cannot predict everything that will or will not happen, but God gives us great insight and wisdom to make the appropriate choices. Rather than feeling aggravated when I see that same co-worker talking about the expensive items she brought over the weekend, I can avoid that agony by just saying no. And we are all human so aggravation is bound to occur no matter how much we love God.

My help does not have to come in the form of a genie who says yes to everything. And if we’re being honest, we can agree that God does not say yes to everything we ask for. He’s wise enough to know that sometimes we need to be told “wait a little longer” or “no, I have something better for you.” So the first or even second time my co-worker asks me for something, I will do my best to supply what’s needed. But after that, I’ve got to take the Heavy D approach and say “I got nothing but love for ya!” That love comes with sound advice about what he or she can do to avoid being in a rut. My Christian background is not a cop out for being a doormat.

The post Christianity Is Not An Excuse To Let People Walk All Over You appeared first on MadameNoire.

What Life Is Like After You Cheat

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[caption id="attachment_830889" align="alignleft" width="1068"] Bigstockphoto.com/Unhappy Young Man Having Argument With Woman At Home[/caption] If you cheat on your partner, your relationship is forever changed—whether or not you tell your partner. If you don’t tell your partner, you’ll experience an internal turmoil that will affect the way you behave around your partner, and possibly even destroy your health. That amount of guilt is not good for your blood pressure, tension in your muscles and more. If you do tell your partner, then you have to face the reality that he may leave you. You may also have to face the reality that he may stay, and you are looking at years of repairing the tremendous damage you have done. Life, after you’ve cheated, is never quite the same. And being a cheater affects more than just your romantic relationship. It has a butterfly effect, touching all areas of your life. Here is what life is like after you cheat. [caption id="attachment_701349" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

You won’t sleep for months

Whether or not you tell your partner, you won’t sleep for months. Say goodbye to feeling rested. The guilt of not telling your partner will keep you awake, or the nausea of the pain you’ve caused your partner by telling him will keep you awake. You’ll be a zombie for at least a quarter of the year.           [caption id="attachment_699584" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll have panic attacks

If you’ve never suffered from panic attacks before, get ready to. Your short-lived action has set into motion a tsunami wave of life changes—for you and other people—and you can feel that wave approaching.             [caption id="attachment_610523" align="alignleft" width="420"] Steve Prezant/Corbis Images[/caption]

You’ll cry out of nowhere

You will truly feel that you have lost control of your life. You don’t trust your own thoughts. You don’t like being with yourself. Your head is your least favorite place to be. You’ll cry out of despair.             [caption id="attachment_617560" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll try denial

You’ll try denial at one point. Either you’ll deny to yourself that the cheating happened. Or you’ll deny that there was anything wrong with it. You’ll tell yourself it meant nothing—that plenty of people cheat and that this doesn’t mean anything about your character. Denial will only result in bigger panic attacks in the future.           [caption id="attachment_719709" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll project onto your partner

If you haven’t told your partner, you’ll start to project onto him. You’ll find things wrong with him, and even accuse him of cheating. Once you can’t trust yourself, you can’t trust anyone.             [caption id="attachment_699419" align="alignleft" width="469"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Your friends won’t trust you

Your friends will judge you. They’ll tell you they aren’t, but they are. You’re wearing a scarlet letter now. They don’t want you around their boyfriends—you don’t trust the sanctity of a relationship as far as they’re concerned. Oh, and they won’t emotionally invest in your future boyfriends because they assume you’re just going to cheat on them, too.             [caption id="attachment_718323" align="alignleft" width="415"] Shutterstock[/caption]

He’ll seek revenge

If you do tell your partner, he’ll seek revenge. This could be either through cheating or just flirting with other people. It could also be through undermining your career and friendships, telling everyone you know what you did, and generally wreaking havoc on your life.             [caption id="attachment_700070" align="alignleft" width="420"] Woman in therapy. Photo: Shutterstock[/caption]

Your family will suggest you see a therapist

Your parents will suggest you see a therapist. In fact, a lot of people will suggest this. You’ll think at first, “I don’t need to see a therapist!” But you do. Cheating is a destructive way of dealing with discontent in a relationship and a therapist can help you find out why you turn to it.           [caption id="attachment_698081" align="alignleft" width="419"] Shutterstock[/caption]

His friends will never like you again

Say goodbye to any approval from his friends. That is over forever. Oh, and their girlfriends and wives, too. They may play nice, but you’ll feel that you’ve been shut out of some club. Eternally.           [caption id="attachment_616901" align="alignleft" width="378"] Corbis Images[/caption]

His family will forever be wary of you

Should you stay together with your partner, things will never be the same with his family again. This is something they will never forget. They may even spy on you from now on, to make sure you don’t hurt their son again.           [caption id="attachment_708137" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll be on life arrest

You’ve given up the right to privacy. Your partner can and will demand to know who you’re texting, where you’re going, who you’re seeing and what you’re doing at all times. And you’re not allowed to protest. If you protest, you are welcoming in a huge fight.             [caption id="attachment_613151" align="alignleft" width="442"] Corbis[/caption]

You’ll feel isolated

Cheaters are a part of a small and ostracized club. And even the cheaters in the club don’t like each other, so don’t expect to find any solace there. You’ll feel, now, that there is the rest of the world, and then there is you.             [caption id="attachment_618952" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Sex might make you cry

Whether it’s sex with your partner you cheated on, or sex with new people, you’ll cry because you don’t feel you deserve the pleasure.         [caption id="attachment_623909" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

You need to tell everyone you date

It’s kind of like being a registered child molester; everywhere you go, you’re obligated to tell people your status. And your status is you’re a cheater. People you date will want to know, and they’ll find out one way or another.     [caption id="attachment_616273" align="alignleft" width="445"]Serious Question: What's The Dumbest Thing Your Husband Has Ever Done? Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ll scare away most men

A lot of men will not date a woman who has cheated. Men are not as forgiving of female cheaters as women are of male cheaters. Your dating pool just got a lot smaller.

The post What Life Is Like After You Cheat appeared first on MadameNoire.

Meet Bachelorette Rachel Lindsay’s Very Diverse Potential Suitors

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On Monday begins the next chapter in The Bachelorette saga, the very first featuring a Black woman. Rachel Lindsay, the 31-year-old attorney from Texas, is choosing among the most diverse group of people in the history of The Bachelor and The Bachelorette franchises. This is something that Lindsay wanted when she talked about her upcoming season earlier this year. Rachel Lindsay The Bachelorette "I’m hoping that as a black Bachelorette you’re going to get to see a more diverse cast, a cast that’s reflective of what America looks like," she said in March. "And not just Bachelor Nation or whatever else, but what America looks like." She got her wish, as 11 of the 31 men are Black. But considering that Lindsay said that she wasn't going to succumb to the pressure put on her to choose a Black suitor, we'll just have to see what happens when Season 13 of the show premieres on ABC on Monday, May 22. Meet the fellas: https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNTExshpaZ/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Will, 28 - Sales Manager

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNToO-Bprm/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Rob, 30 - Law Student

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNUQDKBaih/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Mohit, 26 - Product Manager

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNUcgFBno7/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Milton, 31 - Hotel Recreation Supervisor

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNUpeqhpEE/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Michael, 26 - Former Professional Basketball Player

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNU2qFhyUE/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Matt, 32 - Construction Sales Representative

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNVDHOBwrN/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Lucas, 30 - "Whaboom"

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNVQj6Be6K/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Lee, 30 - Singer/Songwriter

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNVbZIBGWi/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Kyle, 26 - Marketing Consultant

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNVmkThC8C/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Kenny, 35 - Professional Wrestler

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNVxMjhZtZ/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Josiah, 28 - Prosecuting Attorney

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNV8fphPWc/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Jonathan, 31 - "Tickle Monster"

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNWJ1dhpON/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Jedidiah, 35 - ER

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNWVZlhIib/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Jamey, 32 - Sales Account Executive

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNWfmUhx8U/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Jack, 32 - Attorney

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNWpxohZZK/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Iggy, 30 - Consulting Firm CEO

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNWy-PBmsr/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Grant, 29 - Emergency Medicine Physician

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNW-JiBWIt/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Fred, 27 - Executive Assistant

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNXIxahdDm/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Eric, 29 - Personal Trainer

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNXTInBIMV/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

DeMario, 30 - Executive Recruiter

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNXfAwB4NH/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Dean, 26 - Startup Recruiter

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNXvL-BJF8/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Bryce, 30 - Recruiter

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNYEhYhhLZ/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Bryan, 37 - Chiropractor

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNYO3PB3nx/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Brady, 29 - Male Model

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNYdIIhD00/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Blake, 29 - U.S. Marine Veteran

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNYoD5hUhx/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Blake E., 31 - Aspiring Drummer

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNYyWLhoeC/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Anthony, 26 - Education Software Manager

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNY8hHh8Yb/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Alex, 28 - Information Systems Supervisor

https://www.instagram.com/p/BUNZHAaBiKJ/?tagged=bachelornation&hl=en

Adam, 27 - Real Estate Agent

Kenneth, aka, "Diggy", 31 - Senior Inventory Analyst

Peter, 31 - Business Owner

Images via WENN, Instagram, Facebook and Twitter 

The post Meet Bachelorette Rachel Lindsay’s Very Diverse Potential Suitors appeared first on MadameNoire.

Xscape Is Back Like They Never Left…Take A Listen

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Yesterday, Xscape was trending on Twitter like it was 1995. And chile, that’s because from this video of the group harmonizing together, it seems like no time has passed at all. They all still got it. Don’t believe me, just watch.

We already reported that not only was the group reuniting but they were also going on tour. And apparently, one of those tour stops is Essence Festival.
In anticipation of their reunion on the grand stage, the group sat down with Essence to speak about the factors that contributed to their separation in the first place.

LaTocha Scott said, “We also didn’t have that unbiased person there to kind of come in and be that buffer and say, ‘you’re right’ or ‘you’re wrong’ but, let’s just fix it and because of that, we grew apart,” she says. “When you’re that age, sometimes you just don’t try to figure it out. You think it’s probably easier to just walk away. Now that we’re women, we know how to fix it. I think separation brings on appreciation a lot of times and now we’re just appreciating each other and what we each bring to the table. Of course you have ups and downs but, we got through those times. We want people to know that and not just think, ‘Oh, they broke up and that was the end of XSCAPE.'”

They also spoke about the biopic and why they’re excited to finally tell their story.

“There were a lot of things we had to experience as young girls in this industry that, at the time, it wasn’t ‘cute’ or ‘acceptable’ to talk about,” Tamika says. “So, now we feel like we can just tell our story because we feel like it may help somebody else who might be going through the same things that we did. We all have different stories and we want to let people know the real story that was hidden.”

I can’t wait.

So happy for them.

The post Xscape Is Back Like They Never Left…Take A Listen appeared first on MadameNoire.

Double The Blessings: Ronnie And Shamari DeVoe Announce They’re Having Twins

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If you needed any further confirmation that 2017 is about to be the year of twins (or multiples in general), look no further than Ronnie DeVoe and wife Shamari.

Ronnie and Shamari Devoe PF

Aren’t they cute together? The couple announced on social media this week that they’re expecting double the blessing, and they’re overjoyed about it:

Instagram Photo

Shamari, 37, and Ronnie DeVoe, 49, announced in February that they were expecting their first child together, spilling the beans on her birthday. The pair have been married since 2006.

It’s been a great start to the year for the couple, not only because of this pregnancy, but also because of the success of the New Edition biopic, which aired in January. The group is said to be getting back in the studio, working on new music, following an announcement from Johnny Gill. New Edition is set to ride the wave of popularity the miniseries helped them regain by going on tour with SWV and En Vogue soon.

Back in April, Ronnie and Shamari dressed up in Adidas track suits for a friend’s ’80s birthday party and were some adorable parents to be during a fun photo shoot:

Instagram Photo

So happy for these two. As if one baby wasn’t already amazing, two is quite the spectacular gift.

 

Images via Splash and Instagram 

The post Double The Blessings: Ronnie And Shamari DeVoe Announce They’re Having Twins appeared first on MadameNoire.

Kelly Rowland’s Belated Mother’s Day Note A Reminder It’s Never Easy Celebrating Without Your Mom

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A few weeks after giving birth to her first child, son Titan, Kelly Rowland lost her mother, Doris Rowland Garrison, at the age of 66. At the time, she issued a statement through her publicist, speaking on the impact her mom’s love had on the mother she was becoming.

Kelly Rowland mom

“It is with deep sadness that I announce the passing of my mother, Doris Rowland Garrison,” part of her statement read. “She was an incredible soul who made countless sacrifices so that I could become the woman—and now mother—I am today.”

She hasn’t spoken that much since then about her mother, as it’s understandably tough for the 36-year-old. But on Monday, a day after Mother’s Day, Rowland celebrated both her late mother and grandmother with a heartfelt message and memory. She shared it on Instagram:

Instagram Photo

Doris Rowland Garrison died in 2014 after going into cardiac arrest. In an interview with 60 Minutes earlier this year while promoting her new parenting book, Whoa, Baby!: A Guide for New Moms Who Feel Overwhelmed and Freaked Out (and Wonder What the #*$& Just Happened), she talked about the day her mom passed.

“It was hard because I’d just watched my son come into this world and I actually watched her go. Like, literally watched her go. I remember when they pulled the plug,” Rowland said before breaking down.

“There’s not a day that goes by I don’t think of her,” she added.

Images via WENN and Instagram

The post Kelly Rowland’s Belated Mother’s Day Note A Reminder It’s Never Easy Celebrating Without Your Mom appeared first on MadameNoire.

How’s Motherhood Treating Porsche Thomas?

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Last summer we announced that "Real Housewives of Atlanta" castmember Peter Thomas was going to be a grandfather, twice over this time. His daughter Porsche Thomas was expecting twins. Then, earlier this year Porsche had to clapback at a couple of haters who wanted to clown her for her skin tone. She had the perfect response for it. So you may be wondering what Porsche's little ones look like. And how she's faring as a mother of twin boys. Well, her Instagram shows at least the highlights. Check them out on the following pages.
Breastfeeding in the middle of walks.
A deeper, more introspective look.

Took the girls out last night #nightout #7weekspostpartum #hubby #twins

A post shared by porschethomas (@porschethomas) on

Breastfeeding boobs!

August. 2 months. #twins #twinmom #augustandberlin

A post shared by porschethomas (@porschethomas) on

Berlin. 2 months. #twins #twinmom #augustandberlin

A post shared by porschethomas (@porschethomas) on

Another day, another rap album cover. #twins #twinmom #augustandberlin #love

A post shared by porschethomas (@porschethomas) on

Dudes in denim

Parties like his mama #twins #twinmom #augustandberlin #love #dancer #swag #12weeks

A post shared by porschethomas (@porschethomas) on

Bathtime.
Thanks Mom!

The post How’s Motherhood Treating Porsche Thomas? appeared first on MadameNoire.


Struggles Only IBS Sufferers Understand

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[caption id="attachment_830989" align="alignleft" width="1068"] bigstockphoto.com/horizontal photograph of a young beautiful African American fashion model[/caption] Irritable bowel syndrome comes up a lot in medical journals. Your doctor has probably mentioned it to you once or twice when you’ve complained of digestive discomfort. People who don’t have IBS can think it’s not really a big deal—that it’s akin to seasonal allergies and those who have it can just pop some over-the-counter medication and go on about their day. But IBS can consume a person’s life. Because of the very nature of the syndrome (it’s not exactly the most glamorous topic) people who suffer from IBS don’t usually talk about it. But considering that between 24 and 45 million people in the United States suffer from it, and two out of three of whom are women, there is a good chance that individuals in your circle of friends have some degree of IBS. Here are struggles only people with IBS understand.   [caption id="attachment_711192" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Dating someone new is complicated

Sleeping over at a new boyfriend’s house is an experience filled with land mines. You wish you didn’t have to explain why you spend so much time in the bathroom, and you wish you could just hop out of bed and have the heavy brunch he wants to make you. But you don’t get to have any mystery in your relationships.       . [caption id="attachment_625902" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Early wake ups ruin everything

Your internal clock is extremely sensitive. If you have to get up at 5 in the morning for a flight, you just can’t go to the bathroom that day. And when you can’t go one day, it makes it harder to go the next day. It’s not that you aren’t a morning person or you like to sleep late—it’s that your bowels need proper rest to work. . [caption id="attachment_722629" align="alignleft" width="377"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Traveling can be a nightmare

Having to go to the bathroom fast because your train is leaving in ten minutes and being conscious of the long line for the airplane bathroom—these are some of your worst nightmares.             . [caption id="attachment_717498" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Thai food for a first date—HA!

Your date wants to take you somewhere adventurous like a Thai food restaurant or a Szechuan place. You want to be a good sport, but eating that food will ruin the night.             . [caption id="attachment_700825" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Things like camping and Coachella: NO

You aren’t being a Princess or a diva or high maintenance. You literally cannot just use porta potties all weekend. It doesn’t work that way for you.             . [caption id="attachment_708425" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

You sneak your office into the bathroom

You try to low-key bring your laptop, coffee, phone, and phone charger into the bathroom. You’re going to be in there for a while, so you may as well get some work done.           . [caption id="attachment_719160" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

You take calls on the toilet

You’ve taken serious business calls on the toilet. You’re a master at hitting the mute button at just the right times.             . [caption id="attachment_697524" align="alignleft" width="468"] Image: Shutterstock[/caption]

You tailor your wardrobe to it

High-waist pants that close tight around your tummy? Crop tops that show off your abdomen? Hah. Those are for other people. You never know when bloat will destroy your day, and you need clothes that accommodate it.             . [caption id="attachment_712463" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

You really do need your own bathroom

You don’t have a problem sharing space. You’re not spoiled. But you truly need your own bathroom. You’re willing to pay the extra $200 in rent every month to have it.           . [caption id="attachment_623973" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ve spent a lot of time and money on doctors

You don’t even want to think about the thousands of dollars you’ve spent on doctors, trying to find out what’s wrong with you. All they ever said was you have IBS, and there’s really no cure.   . [caption id="attachment_607975" align="alignleft" width="419"]No Love On Tinder Shutterstock[/caption]

You’ve canceled plans because of it

You’ve canceled plans you were really looking forward to because your IBS acted up. Your friends think you’re a hypochondriac or you make too big of deal of “Just a little stomach ache.”           . [caption id="attachment_703373" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Coffee has to be timed out correctly

No, you can’t just try this famous Cappuccino place in the city at 4 pm. Coffee has some very special effects on you, and your friend doesn’t have time to wait while those effects take place.           . [caption id="attachment_611081" align="alignleft" width="423"] Corbis Images[/caption]

Everyone thinks they have the magic cure

Everyone thinks they know the one trick to cure your IBS. Have you tried this powder you mix into your water? Have you tried this probiotic? Have you tried cutting this out of your diet? Adding that? Yes, you have tried it all.         . [caption id="attachment_717085" align="alignleft" width="414"] Shutterstock[/caption]

New foods are a bit scary

You never quite know how your body will react to a brand new food, which makes trying them away from home (and away from your bathroom) scary.             . [caption id="attachment_699107" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Surprise visitors are not a good thing

You do not like it when people just pop by your apartment to say hello. Your apartment is your IBS sanctuary. For all they know, you just got the lighting right, did the perfect yoga pose, and had that tea that helps you go to the bathroom. And then somebody knocked on the damn door.         . [caption id="attachment_610381" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock.com[/caption]

You had a colonoscopy very young

Most people have their first colonoscopy at age 50, but not you! You had one when you were 20 years old. Preparing for and recovering from it is how you spent your Spring Break, sophomore year of college.           . [caption id="attachment_712175" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Your routine is so important

You don’t have OCD and you aren’t afraid to shake things up. Your intestines are a delicate ecosystem and they depend on your routine to function.               . [caption id="attachment_623268" align="alignleft" width="422"] Corbis Images[/caption]

You can’t be rushed out the door

You’re not one of those people who can just hop out of bed and walk out the door. You need at least an hour at home in the morning to see if your bowels have any business to take care of.           . [caption id="attachment_702725" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

People think you’re vain

Because you spend so much time in the bathroom. Yeah right—you wish you were in there doing your makeup. That sounds nice.               . [caption id="attachment_706468" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Exercise is complicated

You can’t really exercise unless you’ve gone to the bathroom that day and had a satisfactory bowel movement. Otherwise exercising can just, um, shake things up in a bad way. That’s why you can’t meet the girls for a beach power walk at 10 am on a Saturday.

The post Struggles Only IBS Sufferers Understand appeared first on MadameNoire.

Don’t Sleep On Saycon Sengbloh’s Style

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[caption id="attachment_826177" align="alignnone" width="1068"] Saycon Sengbloh attending ABC's 'Scandal' 100th episode celebration, at Fig & Olive in West Hollywood, California.
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: West Hollywood, California, United States
When: 08 Apr 2017
Credit: Nicky Nelson/WENN.com[/caption] The name Saycon Sengbloh may not immediately ring a bell but we know you've seen the actress in at least one of two places. In 2015, Sengbloh played the role of Helena (wife number one) in Danai Gurira's Broadway debut Eclipsed, for which she received a Tony Award nomination for Best Featured Actress in a Play and won the Drama Desk Award for Outstanding Featured Actress. And earlier this year she landed a recurring role as Angela Webster on Scandal. Sengbloh has also earned a spot on our list of best-dressed ladies. The more we see her on the red carpet, the more in love we fall with her full fro and natural hairstyles, not to mention her gorgeous gowns. And though the Georgia Peach looks amazing in any shade she wears, we have to say we think white might be her color. Take a look at Saycon Sengbloh's best style moments. [caption id="attachment_826183" align="alignnone" width="700"] Holler If Ya Hear Me opening night party held at Gotham Hall - Arrivals
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: New York, New York, United States
When: 20 Jun 2014
Credit: Joseph Marzullo/WENN.com[/caption] [caption id="attachment_826184" align="alignnone" width="702"] Saycon Sengbloh attending ABC's 'Scandal' 100th episode celebration, at Fig & Olive in West Hollywood, California.
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: West Hollywood, California, United States
When: 08 Apr 2017
Credit: Nicky Nelson/WENN.com[/caption] [caption id="attachment_826185" align="alignnone" width="700"] Opening night after party for Informed Consent at Tir Na Nog restaurant - Arrivals.
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: New York City, New York, United States
When: 18 Aug 2015
Credit: Joseph Marzullo/WENN.com[/caption] [caption id="attachment_826186" align="alignnone" width="700"] 2016 American Theatre Wing Gala honoring Cicely Tyson, held at the Plaza Hotel - Arrivals.
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: New York, New York, United States
When: 27 Sep 2016
Credit: Joseph Marzullo/WENN.com
**No Contact Music**[/caption] [caption id="attachment_826188" align="alignnone" width="700"] National Geographic's 'The Story Of God' narrated by Morgan Freeman World Premiere
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: New York, New York, United States
When: 22 Mar 2016
Credit: Ivan Nikolov/WENN.com[/caption] [caption id="attachment_826190" align="alignnone" width="700"] 2016 OBIE Awards held at Webster Hall
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: New York, New York, United States
When: 23 May 2016
Credit: Joseph Marzullo/WENN.com
**No Contact Music**[/caption] [caption id="attachment_826191" align="alignnone" width="700"] 2016 New Dramatists 67th Annual Luncheon held at the New York Marriott Marquis - Arrivals.
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: New York, New York, United States
When: 12 May 2016
Credit: Joseph Marzullo/WENN.com
**No Contact Music**[/caption] [caption id="attachment_826192" align="alignnone" width="700"] Opening night party for Eclipsed at Gotham Hall - Arrivals.
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: New York, New York, United States
When: 06 Mar 2016
Credit: Joseph Marzullo/WENN.com
**No Contact Music**[/caption] [caption id="attachment_826189" align="alignnone" width="700"] 2016 Drama Desk Awards held at Town Hall - Arrivals.
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: New York, New York, United States
When: 05 Jun 2016
Credit: Joseph Marzullo/WENN.com
**No Contact Music**[/caption] [caption id="attachment_826193" align="alignnone" width="700"] 2016 Tony Awards - Red Carpet Arrivals
Featuring: Saycon Sengbloh
Where: New York, New York, United States
When: 13 Jun 2016
Credit: Ivan Nikolov/WENN.com[/caption]

The post Don’t Sleep On Saycon Sengbloh’s Style appeared first on MadameNoire.

Why The Term “Friend Zone” Needs To Go

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[caption id="attachment_831005" align="alignleft" width="1068"] Bigstockphoto.com/Couple having picnic on beach[/caption] Ah, the Friend Zone. You’ve probably heard this term since you were in middle school, or whatever age you took an interest in sex and romance. For those of you who don’t know, the term became popular after the character Joey Tribbiani told Ross Geller on “Friends” that he was in the Friend Zone with Rachel Green. While “Friends” is a tremendous show and an iconic symbol of the late 90s and early 2000s, we could have done without this term becoming so widely used. Millions of women are probably enjoying friendships with men right now, blissfully unaware that, behind their backs, those men are off complaining to their buddies that they are in the Friend Zone. Is it such a bad place to be? Apparently. Here is why the term Friend Zone needs to go. [caption id="attachment_701813" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

It takes responsibility away

I got news for you; if you’re in the Friend Zone, you put yourself there. You could be in the zone where you, oh, I don’t know, confess your feelings to the person. But then you’d be in a zone where maybe she rejected you. You don’t want to be in that zone, so you pretend that you’re being kept—against your will—in the Friend Zone.         . [caption id="attachment_620946" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

It implies some torture

When men say they’re in the Friend Zone, they make the women who allegedly “put them there” sound like bitches. Hey guys: your female friends believe you enjoy being their friends. Why? Because you SAY YOU DO. They have no idea you’re not enjoying this relationship.     . [caption id="attachment_699960" align="alignleft" width="468"] Shutterstock[/caption]

It makes friendship a holding zone

It implies that a friendship is just a steppingstone to a sexual relationship, and not a complete relationship, in and of itself. It means that men only endure friendship in the hopes of getting sex out of it.               . [caption id="attachment_609305" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

It belittles the friendship

The Friend Zone implies that the guy is only getting a small piece of the larger pie. Rather than thinking of what a nice friendship a man has with a woman, he just thinks about all the sex he isn’t having with her.     . [caption id="attachment_718323" align="alignleft" width="415"] Shutterstock[/caption]

It’s sexist

Mostly men use this term and we all know it. Why? Because if a man and a woman have a sexless relationship, god forbid men just let that be called a friendship. They need to put a big, flashing label on it that screams, “I don’t get to have sex with this woman! Can you believe that!”         . [caption id="attachment_717933" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

There are no other zones

If there were other zones, fine. Maybe the Friend Zone would be acceptable. But there are two and only two zones: the Friend Zone, and the Sex Zone. And that fact is what makes all the other points on this list true.           . [caption id="attachment_616273" align="alignleft" width="445"]Serious Question: What's The Dumbest Thing Your Husband Has Ever Done? Shutterstock[/caption]

Only cowards use it

You don’t see confident, gutsy men out there talking about the Friend Zone. And you know why that is? Confident, gutsy men make their intentions and desires known with everyone in their lives—from friends to colleagues to roommates. They don’t sit around and let someone else define their relationship. If they like a woman, they tell her, and they prepare themselves for the consequences.       . [caption id="attachment_704623" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

It’s a cop out

Guys who use the term Friend Zone can’t admit that the woman just doesn’t like them. She doesn’t walk around with the men in her Friend Zone in her head, ready to pluck one out for sex at a moment’s notice. She isn’t romantically interested in those men, and wouldn’t be under any circumstances. No mystical sports rules are standing in her way of dating them.         . [caption id="attachment_709038" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

It’s dishonest

Hey men: you know that woman who you’re saying Friend Zoned you thinks you genuinely want to be friends, right? She is out there believing you are a true friend who is totally open and honest with her and has no hidden agenda. What a shame that that isn’t true, and you don’t have the guts to tell her.           . [caption id="attachment_717848" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

It sounds like one thing could change everything

While in sports, one correct play or move could get you out of a zone, that isn’t the case in relationships. You aren’t in the Friend Zone because you haven’t figured out one tiny thing to do differently. You are in there because that woman overwhelmingly sees you as a friend and not at all as anything else. One little action wouldn’t change that.       . [caption id="attachment_704633" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Dating isn’t a sport

It’s generally insulting to talk about dating and relationships using sports terminology. Sex and women are not something to be won or competed for. They aren’t trophies.             . [caption id="attachment_701800" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

It implies the guy is acting

If you say you’re in the Friend Zone, then that implies if you wanted to date a woman and made it know, you would behave in an entirely different way. If that is true, then you’re either not being your real self now, or you’re not your real self when you date someone. Either way, you need to get right with yourself on the inside.         . [caption id="attachment_611722" align="alignleft" width="500"]tell about a man Shutterstock[/caption]

It excludes friendship from romance

Couples are friends too, ya know? Friendship isn’t only for non-sexual relationships. If the woman you’re into has a boyfriend, this may come as a shock but, she also considers that man her friend.     . [caption id="attachment_719470" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

It implies sex is a reward/ending

The Friend Zone implies that any sort of relationship between a man and a woman is incomplete until there is sex.             . [caption id="attachment_695505" align="alignleft" width="500"]woman upset, staring, angry Shutterstock[/caption]

It’s entitled

Has a man ever been excited to be in the Friend Zone? No. When they say it, they’re whining, complaining and generally being big babies. Why? Because men who use this term believe, on some level, that if they’re a nice guy, they deserve to have sex with any woman they’re interested in. And if they don’t get to have sex with her, that’s the equivalent of being put on time out. Like a big baby.

The post Why The Term “Friend Zone” Needs To Go appeared first on MadameNoire.

Aisha Tyler Ordered To Pay Ex-Husband $2 Million In Spousal Support

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These days it doesn’t matter if you’re a woman or a man. If a person leaves a marriage where their spouse ended up accruing much more money than they were ever able to get their hands on during the relationship, more than likely, they’ll want to leave with a cut.

Aisha Tyler husband

The Talk co-host Aisha Tyler is learning that firsthand now that her marriage to Jeff Tietjens is over. The couple wed in 1992, so he’s been with Tyler from the very beginning, despite spending much of his time out of the spotlight. After separating in 2015, Tietjens filed for divorce in April 2016. According to TMZ, as part of her divorce settlement, Tyler has been ordered to pay her ex-husband $31,250 a month for the next four years, along with an additional lump sum of $500,000. That’s $2,000,000. But that’s not all Tietjens is walking away from his marriage with. He and Tyler will also reportedly split the money made from selling their home, and he will get to take their 2012 Lexus. As for the comedian, she will get a 2013 Tesla and get to keep her companies to herself — BTDO Media and Hot Machine.

Tyler spoke about the demise of her marriage on The Talk following Tietjens’s decision to file in 2016.

“My husband and I met when I was a teenager and I’ve been with him for more than half of my adult life,” she said. “It’s very hard when you love someone very much to also start to realize that maybe you want different things for your lives.”

“I don’t, not in any way see this relationship as a failure,” Tyler added. “We loved each other passionately and we lived life fully and we’re trying to let each other go in the kindest way we possibly can … that’s what I’m going to say about the relationship and the rest of it is none of your damn business!”

Images via WENN and Twitter 

The post Aisha Tyler Ordered To Pay Ex-Husband $2 Million In Spousal Support appeared first on MadameNoire.

Steve Harvey’s Ex Wife Is Suing Him, Claiming He Damaged Her Soul

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Though Steve Harvey and his ex wife Mary Harvey finalized their divorce back in 2005, there are still some unresolved feelings on her part.

So much so that she’s filed a lawsuit against Harvey claiming that he damaged her soul and now owes her $60 million.

In documents filed earlier this week, Mary said that she’s suffered a number of side effects as a result of their breakup. She claims she’s been suicidal and often self medicates in an attempt to cope.

Mary also asserts that since their separation, she’s lost her son, her business and the joy of Mother’s Day. As the suit writes, “All was loss Mary L. Harvey was dead.”

She’s also suing Steve for child endangerment, torture, conspiracy against rights, kidnapping, murder, breach of contract and intentional infliction of emotional distress.

The document, which TMZ claimed tended to ramble, was not filed by a lawyer but by a woman who claimed to be Mary’s civil right’s activist.

As far as what Steve Harvey has to say about the suit, his attorney Brandon Williams told TMZ, “Mr. Harvey vehemently denies any allegations set forth in the lawsuit. The complaint is meritless, frivolous and the allegations are completely false. We will vigorously defend/counterclaim against the complaint.”

The post Steve Harvey’s Ex Wife Is Suing Him, Claiming He Damaged Her Soul appeared first on MadameNoire.

Serious Question: Has A Bad Vacation Ever Made You Leave Early?

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Bad Vacation

Most times when you go on vacation you wish you could stay longer. Five days and four nights isn’t nearly enough time in paradise; even 10 days can fly by when you really love a destination (and are dreading returning to work). And then there are times when things are so bad you wish you never came — and you try to leave as fast as you can.

A friend of mine recently told me a story about taking a trip with seven other people who are members of one of the travel group’s she’s in. They’d had the opportunity to check out a hotel on a remote island not many people visit and when they touched down, accommodations weren’t exactly what they expected. To top it off, it was very difficult to get some of the essentials they needed to feel comfortable during their stay and food wasn’t exactly easily accessible. By the next morning, one of the members of the group had had enough and peaced out on the first flight they could get. My friend said she initially thought the girl’s response was a bit extreme but when things never improved from the second day on she realized maybe she should’ve followed suit.

When my friend first told me the story I agreed with her. I thought, things couldn’t have been that bad that ol’ girl didn’t even give the island a chance. And then I remembered sitting in a hotel room in the Shangri La in Manila nearly two years ago trying to reach Air China so I could return to New York City as soon as possible and I realized, yes they could.

In the Philippines I was more than out of my element for a number of reasons. But I could’ve tolerated the constant stares from locals who’d never seen a Black woman before and the KFCs on every corner if I at least had somewhere comfortable to rest my head at night. See the Shangri La was not a part of the plan — or my budget — but after an Airbnb bamboozlement situation involving roaches and unreliable internet I told my sister pack her bags and book a room on my card. She was only willing to split the cost for two nights and when I thought about checking out of the comfort of the luxury hotel and back into another Airbnb I just couldn’t fathom it. Nothing about the four days I’d spent in Manila thus far had been enjoyable, from Muntinlupa to Parañaque and Makati. All I wanted to do was be on American soil in a crowded subway train listening to a Dominican musician beat his drum at 8 am, annoying every half-awoke passenger inside the car instead of being hounded by beggars in the streets who yelled at us when we didn’t give them money and who gave us an entirely different view of true poverty. And so I spent whatever it cost to wait on the line for some 30 minutes of international call roaming to speak to a representative and beg them to let me return to dirty New York City because I was going absolutely crazy. As poor luck would have it, I wasn’t able to leave any earlier and I had to tough out the last two days cooped up in another Airbnb counting down the hours ’til my flight.

It was an experience that turned me off to traveling for an entire year — like I didn’t even go to Ohio for Christmas because I didn’t want to see another airplane. But having had more positive experiences since then, I know you can’t win ’em all when you voyage to an unknown destination. That being said, I am still not above trying to make a swift exit if need be when life abroad isn’t the experience I was hoping for.

Have you ever left a vacation early because you weren’t comfortable?

Image: Bigstock

The post Serious Question: Has A Bad Vacation Ever Made You Leave Early? appeared first on MadameNoire.

Remy Ma Is Glad She “Dodged That Bullet” When It Comes To Former Friend Rashidah Ali

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Last month we asked you if it’s ever okay to befriend the enemy of your former friend after reality star Rashidah Ali was spotted making nice with Nicki Minaj. Ali and Remy Ma were supposed to be close friends, and, if you’ll recall, Nicki and Remy fell out earlier this year and brought us perhaps the year’s biggest rap beef. But questions of loyalty were taken a step further after Nicki released a video for her diss track, “No Frauds,” (made in response to Remy’s “SHEther”) and Ali was featured in it. She makes an appearance right when Nicki makes allegations about her rap counterpart having some unsuccessful plastic surgery.

Ali didn’t consider herself disloyal and claimed that she wasn’t working with Nicki out of spite, but most people didn’t believe her. The question is, did Remy?

Remy Ma Rashidah Ali

In a new interview with Power 106’s The Cruz Show in Los Angeles, Remy stated that while she believes Ali was disloyal (originally saying “Who?” when her former BFF’s name was brought up), she wasn’t surprised by her appearance in the clip, nor does she truly care.

“I wasn’t particularly shocked,” she said. “I wasn’t really shocked. You know what? Nothing shocks me anymore … I’m never like, ‘Oh my god I can’t believe it!’ Nothing really shocks me and nothing really moves me neither. I have to care to be like, ‘Oh my god!’ But if you don’t care, it really doesn’t matter at all. I would guess the only question that probably piqued my mind was like, ‘Why you lying though?’ Hmm, strange. Alright, moving along.”

“That’s like if you guys stopped speaking or you guys not hanging with each other and to make me mad, you hang with somebody that you think has a problem with me,” she added. “That doesn’t make me mad. That makes me say, ‘Good thing that I’m not around you.’ Like, ‘Whew! Dodged that bullet!’ It doesn’t make you feel any type of way. So I guess, if that was supposed to be a shot, kinda missed with that one.”

But for the record, Remy isn’t mourning the loss of her friendship with Ali, nor is she thinking about Nicki at this point. Instead, she’s promoting new projects, planning to expand her family and just being happy. Because honestly, people don’t want to see her mad. It wouldn’t be good for anybody.

“People don’t want to see me angry, like people should be happy when I’m chilling,” Remy said. “Like I’ll be chilling, laughing, joking. I’m not really a nice person when I’m
angry and I’ve been happy for like some years now. I’m very happy. I’m happy I have people that love me and that support me no matter what that I’m going through. My career is good. My money is good. My son is good. I don’t really have anything to complain about at all. Period.”

Image via WENN 

The post Remy Ma Is Glad She “Dodged That Bullet” When It Comes To Former Friend Rashidah Ali appeared first on MadameNoire.


Why Did The New York Times Compare Sarah Baartman To Kim Kardashian?

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Many of us have become familiar with the tragic story of Sarah Baartman, also known as Venus Hottentot or Saartje Baartman. For those who don’t, she was the South African woman who was enslaved in the 1800s and ended up being exploited for the shape of her body throughout Europe until she died and long afterward.

There are few people who have experienced the atrocities Sarah Baartman did. Still, that didn’t stop The New York Times from likening her to Kim Kardashian.

In a review of Suzan-Lori Parks’ Venus, they called Baartman “A Kim Kardashian of another era.”

This is wrong on so many different levels. One, Sarah Baartman was dehumanized and reduced to nothing more than her natural body. She didn’t elect to have some type of plastic surgery. And it was White people, White men specifically who gained financially from her body while she died with nothing. Even in death, her body was desecrated, being chopped up and displayed in various museums until the 1970’s. The Kardashian family alteration of their bodies is an investment. An investment that has paid off. Traditionally Black features are celebrated on the Kardashian women. The augmented behinds and lips and whatever other work they’ve had done make the family more alluring and thereby more commercially marketable. They benefit financially from their body augmentation.

The Kardashian family alteration of their bodies is an investment. An investment that has paid off. Traditionally, Black features are celebrated on the Kardashian women. The augmented behinds and lips and whatever other work they’ve had done, make the family more alluring and thereby more commercially marketable. Whether it’s a sex tape, editorial spread or their reality show, they benefit financially from their body augmentation.

And the fact that Ben Brantley, the author of the article and his editors at The New York Times, couldn’t see there are no similarities between Kim and Sarah, became yet another argument for the need of Black women writers in mainstream publications. Because clearly there are not enough voices of color to speak up in positions of power in these places.

Thankfully, there were some Black women who had plenty to say to The New York Times.

 

Even when they edited the tweet, it was still off.

Wrong. Baartman was never the recipient of any fortune. They eventually apologized for the initial tweet.

They initially apologized for the tweet.

We’re willing to bet that even after viewing the play that they still don’t understand the error of their ways.

The post Why Did The New York Times Compare Sarah Baartman To Kim Kardashian? appeared first on MadameNoire.

Poor Who?! Don’t Miss Michelle Williams’ Glow Up

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  Michelle Williams has always been cute. Still, the internet is hellbent on painting her as some type of victim. But that’s just not who she is. And this post is not to convince you of that. But just to make you aware of some interesting and recent developments. Perhaps, Ms. Williams is putting more emphasis on the fashion aspect of her life and it is working. Check out some of her more bomb outfits on the following pages.  

💛

A post shared by Michelle Williams (@michellewilliams) on

 

No matter what.....STAND! 💕

A post shared by Michelle Williams (@michellewilliams) on

Dress by @eseazenabor (I wanted y'all to see the front) #wearableartgala 💕

A post shared by Michelle Williams (@michellewilliams) on

#poormichelle 😉👌🏽

A post shared by Michelle Williams (@michellewilliams) on

Boop! Let 'em know girl.

The post Poor Who?! Don’t Miss Michelle Williams’ Glow Up appeared first on MadameNoire.

How To Handle In-Laws Who Are On Your Last Nerve

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[caption id="attachment_827765" align="alignleft" width="1068"] Bigstockphoto.com/Couples Dancing Together At A Nightclub[/caption] Dealing with pushy in-laws is a very delicate process. At the end of the day, no matter how much your partner also agrees that his parents cross some boundaries and put their noses where they don’t belong, those in-laws are still your boo’s family. You aren’t allowed to be as firm or assertive with them as he is, or he might be offended. Plus, no matter how much the in-laws drive you nuts, you still want them to like you! You’ll be spending holidays, family vacations and who knows what else with them for years to come, so you can’t afford for things to go sour. That being said, if in-laws are too pushy, you can feel like you have no control over your life, and other things like how you raise your children, how you spend your money, and where you buy a home. These are big things not to have control over! So, here is how to deal with pushy in-laws, whether you have them now or will soon. [caption id="attachment_717933" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

First, ask your partner for help

If at all possible, it’s best that your partner talks to his parents about respecting boundaries. They’re already comfortable with a confrontation with him, and this way, you can stay in their good graces.           [caption id="attachment_616901" align="alignleft" width="378"] Corbis Images[/caption]

Tell them you know they care

If you have to approach the issue with your in-laws, always start the conversation by stating you appreciate how much they care about you and your spouse’s well-+being, and you see how much they love your significant other. Make them feel appreciated (that’s really all they want).       [caption id="attachment_699997" align="alignleft" width="468"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Remind them how much you love their son

Sometimes in-laws just feel that you’re taking over the “parenting” of their son. But if you remind them how much you love their son, and what a great job they’ve done raising, him, they may feel more comfortable handing the reigns over.         [caption id="attachment_706179" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Remember, you don’t have to engage

This is a great thing to remember for all confrontation: you don’t have to engage. If your in-laws start spewing off opinions and suggestions about your life, you don’t have to engage in the conversation. You can always smile and nod.         [caption id="attachment_716449" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Choose what you share with them

You don’t need to tell your in-laws everything. If you’re about to have the house painted or you’re selecting summer camps for your children, you don’t need to bring this up until it’s already been done. That way, they can’t be involved in the decisions.         [caption id="attachment_698672" align="alignleft" width="421"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Pre-select tasks for them

Your in-laws just want to feel useful. If you don’t give them ways to help out, they will find ways. So think of little ways they can be helpful to you and your partner, call them up yourself and ask for help. This will keep them busy, and out of the way on the more important matters.       [caption id="attachment_607200" align="alignleft" width="500"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Find ways to include them

Your in-laws also want to be a part of your life! So, if you don’t want them showing up unannounced during date night, invite them to watch you and your spouse play kickball on the weekends. They just want to see what’s going on.   [caption id="attachment_626812" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Remember the phrase, “We’ll think about it”

Pushy in-laws are always giving unsolicited advice. Keep in mind that you don’t need to say, “Okay, we’ll do that” on the spot. You can say, “We’ll think about that.” That will remind them that it is your and your partner’s decision to think about. [caption id="attachment_614757" align="alignleft" width="420"] Corbis[/caption]

You and your partner must be united

No matter what, you and your partner must be united. Even if you don’t agree on something, in front of the in-laws, you need to agree—you can disagree later in private. If they sense disagreement, they’ll swoop in and push their opinions onto you.       [caption id="attachment_701360" align="alignleft" width="420"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Ask their opinion on things that aren’t that important

Are you truly indifferent to which fancy plate set you buy and which housekeeper you hire? Ask your in-laws for their opinions on these matters. Then they may stay out of the more important issues.       [caption id="attachment_622501" align="alignleft" width="500"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

Remember that people love to talk about themselves

If your in-laws just talk and inquire too much about you and your partner, turn the conversation around! People love to talk about themselves, so hound your in-laws with questions about their lives. [caption id="attachment_702871" align="alignleft" width="425"] Shutterstock[/caption]

Set up routine dinners/gatherings

The best way to ensure your in-laws will not push their way into parts of your lives where you don’t want them is to make them feel secure in the fact that they will be included. You can do this by setting up weekly Sunday lunches or Tuesday night dinners.       [caption id="attachment_822954" align="aligncenter" width="900"] Credit: Bigstock[/caption]

Know that pushy people respond to pushiness

Don’t be afraid to just tell your in-laws you and your partner need a little space or need to make some decisions on your own. Pushy people actually tend to respect and respond to assertiveness. [caption id="attachment_716479" align="alignleft" width="420"] Image Source: Shutterstock[/caption]

If they go behind your back, address it

If your in-laws try to go behind your back and talk to your partner about something in your life without you, you need to address it. Don’t be mean about it; just let them know they should feel free to talk to you about those issues.       [caption id="attachment_615258" align="alignleft" width="455"] Corbis[/caption]

Remember, they have to accept you

No matter what happens, keep in mind that your in-laws know your partner is going to be with you for life. They need to accept you, even if you piss them off, or don’t take all of their suggestions.

The post How To Handle In-Laws Who Are On Your Last Nerve appeared first on MadameNoire.

TV Shows That Leave You Feeling Disturbed After Watching

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For a lot of us TV is an escape. It's a chance to unwind after a long day -- maybe even a reward -- and a way to forget about our own problems and get lost in someone else's. But sometimes the shows we choose to watch don't exactly leave us feeling relaxed. In fact, they might leave us disturbed -- either because of their similarities to real-life situations or the fact that their subject matter is just downright freaky.

I won't lie, I love a good thriller or dark drama, but sometimes the following shows leave me wishing I hadn't watched them. Or at least needing a break from them from time to time.

If you're on the fence about marriage, don't watch this true crime series. Sure, the cases focus on women who are accused of murder, but the fact that it's always their partner whom the women attempt to kill just adds more weight to the question of how well you can ever know someone.

To be honest, it's not so much the subjects of the "My 600 LB Life" episodes that leave me feeling disturbed, it's the enablers around them. Most of the morbidly obese individuals on the show eventually get to the bottom of their emotional issues, but the parents and friends who literally feed their habits and are often overweight as well never seem to see themselves in those they're caring for or how their actions contribute to the other person's struggle.

At first, "Chewing Gum" was a hilariously accurate depiction of the late bloomer life I once lived. Eventually, the scenes became so increasingly graphic and disgusting I couldn't manage to make it through the first season of the Netflix series.

I've always loved a good scary story -- a fact my mom has always thought was weird -- but even "American Horror Story" was too much for me after a while. One day I found myself watching Lady Gaga and her partner slit the throats of another couple during a foursome in episode one of "American Horror Story: Hotel" and I literally asks myself "What the f-ck am I looking at?" It was such a sadistic scene that left me feeling upset, not necessarily from the visuals of the graphic scene but way it made me feel mentally. The Walking Dead is far less about zombies than it is human behavior and the way society's break down when their way of life is threatened. We may not be facing an apocalypse (as far as we know) but if that time ever comes, God help us. Other human beings are far scarier than walkers.

If you ever thought to yourself, "Technology is the devil," "Black Mirror" will solidify that belief. The episode "Nosedive" is a cautionary tale of where society is headed in our quest to be liked (at least digitally). Similarly, episodes like "The Waldo Moment" and "White Bear" truly hold up a mirror to society's faults.

Shonda Rhimes' political drama may not leave you with nightmares, but the similarities between the the events that unfold on the fictional show and the way in which our current government operates are quite eerie. Knowing what an issue mass incarceration is for people of color in this country, and given the increasing divide between law enforcement and Black men, it's hard to see this show as "entertainment." A "sudden departure," 140 million people missing, cults on the rise. Nobody wants to think about what life would be like if this really happened one day.

The post TV Shows That Leave You Feeling Disturbed After Watching appeared first on MadameNoire.

Did You Wear This Back In The Day? The Best And Worst Of ’90s Billboard Awards Fashion

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The Billboard Music Awards are this Sunday! And while we're not necessarily jumping off of the walls in excitement about it, it's always nice to see what wild fashions the stars put on for the red carpet that evening. Over the years the looks that have been in vogue have changed big time. The clunky shoes and big hair from the past is nowhere near as popular as the barely-there dresses and all-leather-everything ensembles that usually grace the Billboard Music Awards red carpet these days. Still, the looks from the stars over the years were just a sign of the times -- they were cute for that moment. With this Sunday's festivities in mind, we thought it would be fun to take a look back at some of the ensembles our favorites graced the carpet in during the '90s. Whatever you see, don't clown it too indiscriminately, because chances are you were probably wearing something close to these 'fits back in the day as well. Check out Billboard Awards fashion from the '90s. Billboard Awards 90s fashion

Mariah Carey - 1991

Color Me Badd

Vanessa Williams - 1991

LL Cool J - 1991

Billboard Awards fashion 90s

Whitney Houston - 1993

Queen Latifah and Kim Fields - 1993

Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre - 1993

Salt 'n Pepa  - 1994

Brandy - 1995

Terry Ellis - 1995

Montel Jordan - 1995

Toni Braxton - 1996

LL Cool J - 1996

Mariah Carey - 1996

 

New Edition - 1996

Spice Girls - 1997

Toni Braxton - 1997

LL Cool J - 1997

Puff Daddy and the Family - 1997

Tyson Beckford - 1997

Jay Z - 1999

  Images via WENN and Splash 

The post Did You Wear This Back In The Day? The Best And Worst Of ’90s Billboard Awards Fashion appeared first on MadameNoire.

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