Does your relationship status play a part in how you maintain your pubic hair?

I know some women who wax religiously every five weeks, not for a man, but because they’re more comfortable without hair down there. Then there are those who shave or wax occasionally, and then others who just let it all grow out and hang out (*raises hand emphatically*). Whatever your chosen grooming practice and schedule, how would you feel if the person you were with asked you to either shave down your hair or get rid of it completely?

I ran across an article earlier this week on Cosmopolitan‘s website called “If a Guy Demands That You Get Rid of Your Pubic Hair, Dump Him.” In it, it was shared that in a survey done by the site, 40 percent of men have asked their partner to change their pubic hair while only 23 percent of women have made such a request to a man. To writer Frank Kobola (yes, Frank as in a man), that is unacceptable.

“For one, if a guy has some serious hang-ups about going down on a woman if her pubic hair isn’t up to his precise specifications, he should straight-up not be going down on women at all,” he wrote. “Actually, he should probably voluntarily relocate to a desert island so he can remove himself from the gene pool. No one should ever feel forced to do something they don’t want to do, and guys like this who put their preference and ‘convenience’ above a woman’s comfort and pleasure during sex don’t deserve girlfriends, case closed.”

Tell ’em, Frank!

But who are we kidding? Telling women what to do with their bodies is a favorite pastime of the male race. Hence the reason there are so many advice columns from over the years with women asking whether or not they should be offended that their partners want them to mow their lawns or flat-out refusing to.

Like this woman:

“if my boyfriend and i have agreed to try fingering and whatever else goes with that should i be offended if he asked me if i can shave my vaginal area because he hates hair down there?”

Or this woman:

“So after sex my boyfriend was like, ‘can I make a suggestion? I don’t think it’s mean but you might take it the wrong way.’ I was like, ‘no. you cannot make a suggestion.’ So he was like, ‘Well I was just thinking like maybe you can shave it.’ I got so pissed and freaked out. Keep mind, I am neatly trimmed. I have very little trimmed hair just near the bottom. Should I shave it for him? Was it wrong of him to ask me?”

And like this woman:

“Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, ‘It looks so unnatural.’ Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out ‘Men having hair is okay. Women aren’t supposed to, though.'”

Well, that last guy is just foolish.

But I can understand both sides of this coin. If you’re a woman who enjoys having your boyfriend go down on you, then it shouldn’t be a shock or an insult if they ask you to shave your hair, especially around the lips of your vagina. I’m sure the taste and texture of hair in one’s mouth if off-putting. And if they’re doing such a service for you, I don’t think it’s wrong for someone to openly share their preferences for the conditions they’re working in.

However, I do believe there is a difference between someone respectfully sharing what works for them in the bedroom and such a conversation leaving you feeling like you’re being given orders in the most disrespectful way. I read about a guy who instead of telling his girlfriend that they were only having sex once a month without much foreplay because she had too much hair down there, brought her a “present” that consisted of shaving cream and razors to send such a message. And someone saying pubic hair looks “unnatural” is just asking to get cursed out. But being considerate and specific about why the hair down there may not work (as opposed to “I just don’t like the way it looks…”), to me, isn’t grounds to wonder if you need to dump your man. Still, you have to do what you’re most comfortable with at the end of the day.

I will say, though, that if we’re being honest as women, we can probably admit that for the right man who does all of the right things in the bedroom, this probably wouldn’t be such a big deal or looked at as an out-of-pocket request. But for a guy who is just licking for the sake of licking but not really blowing your mind 69 times, the request then might be grounds for serious pushback. He wants you to go through the painful process of waxing or a tedious shaving method because it’s his preference for your body, but you leave unsatisfied after every sexual encounter? Boy, bye. Shave yourself…

But as always, that’s just my opinion. What say you? Is it petty for a man to ask a woman to cut or completely get rid of her public hair? 

Image by Getty 

The post Is This Petty? He Told Me He Couldn’t Go Down On Me Until I Got Rid Of My Pubic Hair appeared first on MadameNoire.

Drama alert: I received some very disturbing news at the salon Saturday. My ends are splitting up the shaft of my strands and I’m going to have to cut off a significant chunk of my hair. At least that’s what I was told.

I didn’t immediately receive the message because…hair length goals. But also I’d had a trim in January and no one acted like my ends were in dire need of a clipping from on high. I know three months is longer than the recommended 6- to 8-week period for clippings but I couldn’t understand how my hair could be that damaged when I condition it regularly, use heat two times per month at most, and am pretty low maintenance when it comes to combing, brushing, pulling, and tugging. I also wasn’t going to get my hair chopped off into a fly shoulder-length blunt cut in the midst of a blowout when I never wear my hair straight because…shrinkage.

Nevertheless, I can see that my ends are in need of more TLC than I received during last Saturday’s trimming (and was also told so on this product review) so I basically spent the better half of my day yesterday perusing The Cut Life trying to figure out what I’d look like with a pixie cut, because like I told you, I’m dramatic. I really don’t know that I have to get my hair cut quite that short, but there’s also a part of me that has an inkling I was still left with some straight ends after my big chop in October 2015 and that’s why a year and a half later my curls still won’t let me be great — or maybe it’s the other way around.

There’s also a part of me that is not interested in going into Summer 2017 looking more like Brandon than Brande — despite confirmation from my coworker that being the “makeup queen” I’ll be just fine. See as I sat in the salon, I got to chatting with a woman with a fade and she started going on and on about how people assume she’s a lesbian just because of her cut when she really just can’t be bothered to do her hair. The way my single life is set up –I can’t take those chances. But I also don’t want to have to wear makeup all the time, and considering I spend 75% of my life in workout clothes nowadays with no makeup, there could be a lot of room for ambiguity (if you’re the type of person who subscribes to stereotypical gender norms). But even when my coworker pointed out the new short cut of another woman we used to work with I responded with, “Yeah but she’s all cute and petite and stuff” and I’m, well, not petite.

Yet for all of my ridiculous personal hangups, I still look at photos of women like this and admire how beautiful, feminine, and fly they are with their natural cuts.

I also think about how much easier taking care of my hair would be –and how much better my curls might grow in if I start from scratch — and I start to think, hmmm maybe I can rock a short natural cut with this big head of mine after all, regardless of what misconceptions people might have about me as a result. I’m going to think on it a little longer.

Have you ever had any hangups about rocking a super short cut? How did you get over them?

The post Confession: I’m Legit Afraid I’ll Look Like A Man If I Cut My Hair Off appeared first on MadameNoire.

Dîner à Allô! Mon Coco. Gotta love those chains. ☺️

A post shared by Bunmi Laditan (@bunmiladitan) on Apr 6, 2017 at 9:27am PDT

Mothers these days are shaking up the long-held conventions about parenting and raising well-adjusted children who turn into healthy minded adults. Earlier this week, we wrote about the mother who didn’t force her child to share and today, there’s another mom, Bunmi Laditan, who’s decided that her child is through with homework.

For those of you on Twitter, Laditan is the voice behind the hilarious Honest Toddler account, author of a book by the same name as well as Toddlers Are A**holes.

And before you get yourself all worked up into a tizzy, check out Laditan’s rationale.

Before she started enforcing the decision though, this American born mother, living in Canada drafted an e-mail to her daughter Maya’s teachers.

“Hello Maya’s teachers

Maya will be drastically reducing the amount of homework she does this year. She’s been very stressed and is starting to have physical symptoms such as chest pain and waking up at 4AM worrying about her school workload.

She’s not behind academically and very much enjoys school. We’ve consulted with a tutor and a therapist suggested we lighten her workload. Doing 2-3 hours of homework after getting home at 4:30 is leaving little time for her to just be a child and enjoy family time and we’d like to avoid her sinking into a depression over this.

Thank you for understanding.

Warmly, Bunmi.”

When she shared the e-mail on Facebook, she provided a bit more context for her unorthodox decision.

I was one of those kids who stressed about everything and homework was definitely a part of that equation. As early as second grade, I recall tears and even stomach aches over not knowing answers to “fun” little math quizzes that were supposed to be optional challenges.

But more than my own moments of anxiety, Laditan’s strongest point, to me, was that after so many hours in school, children could use a break, just like full grown adults need breaks after working from 9-5. And while I think we’d all agree that there needs to be some type of system set in place to ensure that the children have mastered the skills they’ve learned earlier in class, 2-3 hours of homework after a full day just seems tedious and perhaps a bit of an overkill.

Then again, homework has become such a staple, such an expected standard that educators are going to have to think long and hard about how to replace it.

What do you think of Laditan excusing her daughter from homework?

Veronica Wells is the culture editor at MadameNoire.com. She is also the author of “Bettah Days.” You can follow her on Facebook and on Instagram and Twitter @VDubShrug.

The post New Rules: Mother Excuses Her Daughter From Homework Because It’s Become Too Much appeared first on MadameNoire.

Every now and again, the conversation surrounding the level of wokeness of Black women with blonde hair arises, and every single time it does I find myself tired. Because Black hair is always seen as political, it’s hard for some to fathom that some Black women dye their hair blonde just to try something new or different (not to be like white women). Or, in Cynthia Erivo’s case, to stand out more from the crowd rather than blend in with European beauty standards.

“Some people like it; some people hate it. I don’t care either way,” the Broadway star told Essence of the praise and criticism she’s received for her hair in a recent interview. “I did it because I really wanted people to see my face. The thing about me and having dark hair is I felt like I was hiding and the white hair feels like a light bulb. You can’t miss me. I just stopped being afraid of my face. My hair was really long and I just want to spend less time doing it and have you see my face. Never want to hide behind hair. It’s fun and easy to dress.”

As you’ve likely seen, the Nigerian beauty routinely switches up her style, sporting a kinky fro one minute, and soft waves or curls the next. But if people can’t understand why, no matter what style she wears, her hair is always a shade of platinum blonde, Cynthia says that’s not her problem.

“Hair dye is hair dye. My hair still grows in black at the root and I don’t run to the hairdresser when it happens. I don’t feel like me having blonde hair stops me from wanting to encourage Black women. I’m very happy being Black. It’s something I’m very proud of, and specifically being Nigerian, I couldn’t run away from it if I tried.”

Check out the products Cynthia uses to keep her mane healthy and fabulous and her running list of examples of Black women whose hair naturally grows in in shades other than black on Essence.com.

The post “White Hair Feels Like A Light Bulb:” Cynthia Erivo Wears Blonde Hair To Stand Out, Not Hide Her Blackness appeared first on MadameNoire.

President Obama made headlines when he during his first speaking engagement this past week. Funny thing is, he was the one asking the questions. But the fact that we miss him so much was enough to have folks clamoring over his every word.

He’s not the only one getting back out there. Michelle Obama also appeared at a recent architecture conference to share her thoughts on a few things. While you might think a conference architecture is an odd place for her to show up, our former First Lady used it as an opportunity to discuss the necessity of diverse perspectives in various fields.
She also spoke about what’s next for her since she’s no longer in the White House.

Check out a few of the highlights below via The American Institute of Architects and The Orlando Sentinel. 

“One issue that I’m excited to keep working on is to help young girls around the world get an education,” Obama said. “Education, to my mind, is key to giving women the voice, the structure, the strategy, the tools to improve their conditions. Because if you change the life of a woman, you change the life of a community, a family, a nation.”

On the challenges of being a working mother.

“It’s not easy,” she said, “and it’s never going to be. The one thing I can say to working mothers out there: Don’t beat up on yourselves. What you are doing is hard, and we still don’t live in a society that supports it.”
She shared the story of returning to her position at the University of Chicago and not only asking for what she deserved salary wise but also requesting a schedule change that would allow her to be more available for her children. She said the experience taught her about the importance of using your influence to help others.
“If you have leverage, you have to push for the women who don’t,” she said. “We have to start asking for what we need, and then we need employers to be more open to what work-life balance can actually look like.”

On diversity in the workforce

“That’s not just the field of architecture,” Obama replied. “Look at law, look at science, look at so many professions. The struggle is still real. You can’t start recruiting from a pool that doesn’t exist. You have to build that pool, and you have to start at a young age. So many kids don’t even know what an architect is,” she added. “They don’t think about how buildings are built; they don’t know anything about developing or planning. I know I didn’t, and I was an educated kid. You have kids growing up in communities where people don’t even work, period, let alone as doctors or lawyers or architects. But that’s where all of you come in. You need to go to schools, neighborhoods, communities, any place where underrepresented minorities exist, and start talking. Start small. Make a friend.”

Inauguration day 

“I didn’t want to have tears in my eyes because people would swear I was crying because of the new president.”

On President Obama’s artistic side and the new Library

“I don’t get to work with them often but our architects are so much fun. The creative process—space, time—they think about things that we wouldn’t ever think of. We’re also closely considering the exterior, how it will relate to the community. The architects we’re working with are phenomenal; they’re listening, they’re doing their homework, they’re researching and starting to understand the South Side of Chicago.”

Vonier, the man hosting the event and interviewing Mrs. Obama reminded everyone that former President Barack Obama, once wanted to be an architect.

“Barack is an artist,” she shared, “though he tries to downplay it. He’s the kind of guy who says, ‘I don’t care what the living room looks like,’ and then has a thousand questions and opinions about everything. He’s someone with ideas, he’s someone who thinks big. That’s what architects do too, right?”

On her not running for president for the 50-11th time. 

“It’s all well and good until you start running, and then the knives come out,” she said at the conference. “Politics is tough, and it’s hard on a family…I wouldn’t ask my children to do this again because, when you run for higher office, it’s not just you, it’s your whole family. Plus, there’s just so much more we can do outside of the office, because we won’t have the burden of political baggage.”

Veronica Wells is the culture editor at MadameNoire.com. She is also the author of “Bettah Days.” You can follow her on Facebook and on Instagram and Twitter @VDubShrug.

The post Michelle Obama Talks New Freedom, Gender Equality & Not Crying On Inauguration Day In First Post White House Sit Down appeared first on MadameNoire.

She's a Self-Made Woman - 2009

She Was a Ride or Die - 2010

They Were Excited to Tie the Knot - 2010

She Was Initially Happy to Move From Brooklyn to LA for His Career - 2010

They Did a Lot of Traveling -- and Eating - 2010

They Are Business Partners Who Both Believed in Empowering the Black Community - 2012

She's Better Than Him at Quite a Few Things

They Were Excited About Parenthood - 2013

He Loves Being a Dad - 2014

He Loves...Her Cooking - 2016

The post “She’s Stuck With Me”: Everything Jesse Williams Said About Estranged Wife Aryn Drake-Lee Over The Years appeared first on MadameNoire.

Let’s not front, friends. I’m sure some of you have been watching this latest season of Love and Hip Hop: Atlanta. If you have, then you probably know good and well about the drama going on in Rasheeda and Kirk Frost’s marriage. If not, the summary is that Kirk stepped out yet again, sleeping with a dancer named Jasmine Washington. She ended up pregnant and says the baby is his. Despite publicly stating that he doesn’t believe the baby is his, Kirk set Washington up in an apartment and was paying to help her take care of their alleged son, Kannon. We say alleged because a DNA test still hasn’t occurred.

This has obviously created a lot of chaos in Rasheeda’s life. While she may have kept her distance from Kirk on the show and wants to be separated, the current episodes were filmed a while ago. So where does Rasheeda stand on the future of her marriage now? Although she discussed her situation with the ladies of The Real this week, it’s unclear whether or not she will stay with her longtime love, but she’s sure that she’s not giving a red cent to Washington.

“Well I damn sure ain’t payin’ no woman or having no parts in no damn child support,” Rasheeda said. “You better believe that.”

As for Washington, she’s done some questionable things since coming out with her story. For one, she went to Karlie Redd first, and since then, has talked to all of the people associated with Rasheeda instead of speaking to the reality star and rapper directly. She also put a side-by-side picture of her son Kannon and Rasheeda and Kirk’s son Karter on social media, noting similarities in their appearance (it has since been removed). But in an interview with V-103’s The Ryan Cameron Morning Show this week, Washington said she realized that she’d handled the situation poorly, and also realized her part in being a willing participant in Kirk’s cheating. She wants to apologize to Rasheeda.

“I feel like I owe Rasheeda the biggest apology ever,” Washington said. “I have tried to reach out to her. I feel like maybe I’ve done it wrong. I feel like maybe I should have went to her in the first place and sat down with her and talked. I feel like maybe I’ve done a few things wrong. So I reached out to her. Apparently she’s not trying to hear it, and she has the right to not want to hear it at this point. But still, if Rasheeda is listening, if anybody that knows Rasheeda is listening,  I would love to sit down and have a conversation and try to clear the air and give her the apology that she deserves and the apology that I want to and need to give her.”

We don’t think that sit-down is going to happen, but a gal can always dream…

Check out a snippet of Rasheeda’s chat with the ladies of The Real below and let us know whether or not you think she would actually walk away from her marriage to Kirk.

Image via Splash 

The post While Rasheeda Frost Discusses Future Of Her Marriage, Woman Who Cheated With Kirk Offers Apology appeared first on MadameNoire.

Married almost seven years and the parents of two (there are also three other kids from his previous relationships), you would think that Alicia Keys and Swizz Beatz would have likely hit a romantic slump. It wouldn’t be a shock considering they are both very busy musicians and philanthropists with a family to focus on. But according to Keys, 36, she and Beatz, born Kasseem Dean, 38, find a way to keep things both romantic and spontaneous by making time for date nights. In their case, though, it’s date weekends.

“[Swizz and I] like surprising each other and going on secret weekend dates,” Keys told PEOPLE while promoting her upcoming performance at the Veuve Clicquot Polo Classic in June. She said that they take turns planning and executing something fun they can do as a couple and surprise the other party with the date idea. They leave son Egypt, 6, and Genesis, 2, at home (with someone watching them of course) and focus on one another.

“One of us plans it and the other has no idea where we are going,” Keys said. “We’ve found some undiscovered gems and moments to take hikes or walks or just discover new things about life and each other. Those are my favorite times.”

Keys previously talked about her husband’s spontaneity when speaking on an episode of Oprah’s Master Class.

“He’s such an incredibly, crazy, spontaneous, full of life person,” she said. “He’s just bubbling over with life. I’ve never met a person like him — ever. Few of us are able to be that free to just follow our light and know that it’s going to lead you where you’re meant to go. So, he’s definitely taught me a lot about freedom, and a lot about spontaneity and being open to life and how it’s going to happen. I think before, I was always so kind of regimented about how everything had to happen. I had to plan it all out perfect. But that’s not quite life. I mean, that’s part of life, don’t get it wrong. You definitely have to plan things and execute them. But there’s also another part of life that’s very spontaneous, it’s very natural. It kind of unfolds and it happens to you.”

The message to take from all of this lovey-dovey advice? Improvising when it comes to love is never a bad thing. It’s amazing actually.

Image via WENN 

The post How Do Alicia Keys & Swizz Beatz Keep The Spontaneity In Their Marriage? “Secret Weekend Dates” appeared first on MadameNoire.

Mr. Ellis for sophomore geometry in high school. I remember he stood in the hallway a lot and joked with other teachers while he taught. He also had a dope hobby as a swim coach and a movie starring Terrence Howard would later be made about his team called “Pride”.

Ms. Brown for senior year Algebra II. She would brag about teaching actor Will Smith in her glory days. I hated algebra and barely passed.  She ended up giving me a mercy grade so I could graduate just because she admired the fact that I made the effort. I’m a clichéd writer who hates math, and she taught me you don’t have to be perfect at everything.

Dr. Okafor, undergrad African-American literature. Whenever the “fake woke” white students would debate him and proclaim to know more about his history than he did, he’d shut them down with facts, make them look dumb and go outside and smoke a cigar after class. He was such an OG. I learned a lot in his class because of who he was as a person and not necessarily what was in a book.

I recently sat down and tried to think of all of the African-American educators I’ve ever had throughout my 16 years of formal education (including a double dose of Kindergarten). Besides a few gym teachers and a few teachers’ aides I could only think of three African-American teachers, who stood out to me. But according to a recent study, it may only take just one to keep our kids in school.

The study done by Seth Gershenson and Constance A. Lindsay of American University, Cassandra M.D. Hart of U.C. Davis and Nicholas Papageorge at Johns Hopkins, looked at long-term records for more than 100,000 black elementary school students in North Carolina and determined having just one black teacher in third, fourth or fifth grade reduced low-income black boys’ probability of dropping out of high school by 39 percent. Furthermore, by high school, African-American students, both boys and girls, who had one African-American teacher had much stronger expectations of going to college. Published by the German economic research group Institute of Labor Economics last month, the study builds on a body of evidence that documents the effect on students of having teachers of the same race. Having a teacher who shares a student’s background can help that student’s test scores, behavior and attendance. Long-term benefits were less well-documented, the study’s authors note.

As a someone who has worked in sexual health for a little over eight years, I can attest to the fact that whether it’s an hour-long English class or an after school program where a millennial like me thinks she can save the world on condom demonstration at a time, interacting with black professionals is something that far too many African-American youth never have the opportunity to do. I can’t say that having teachers of color had a profound effect on my academic success, but I also had two working parents who were positive role models in the home. All too often, many kids grow up in neighborhoods where they don’t have opportunities to witness how education can make or break your success as an adult.

In the article, “How Having A Black Woman As A 3rd Grade Teacher Secured My Future” author C. Isaiah Smalls, II writes about his encounter with Columbus Academy’s first African-American teacher in 3^rd grade:

“Mason was my first black teacher, something I did not realize the significance of until later. What ultimately separated Mason from my previous instructors, however, is her empathy. In a world that devalues the Black experience, Mason served as a prime example of what I could accomplish with hard work and perseverance. She made me proud to be Black.”

He shares a story of being specially selected to be in Mason’s class after a difficult transition from a Montessori school education to struggling with the curriculum at Columbus Academy. There Mason saw through a kid who feigned being sick under the pressure to succeed, especially as the only black student in class. She also taught him how to be proud of his culture as well as the “dark” history of being black in America. Because more than filling a quota and more than being a positive role model, what many African-American students need in classrooms are people who can identify with their struggles. Smalls recalls that how Mason made his comfort a priority saying she “always tried to create a community that felt family-like.” Lastly, Smalls points out why it was not only important to have a teacher who believed in him, but a black teacher who believed him:

“Mason’s empathy and patience were vital to my development because she opened my eyes to the beauty and importance of my blackness.”

It’s an issue I’ve run into repeatedly with students whether I’m in a classroom or bump into them on a crowded train. Many youth of color have inherited the mindset that they don’t belong in certain spaces and that certain experiences aren’t an option to them. How can I stand in front of a room full of young people and tell them they can be anything they want to be, when eight out of ten of their teachers don’t look like them?  How can I tell them their opportunities are endless when the professionals they encounter from the doctor to the district manager doesn’t come from their neighborhood or somewhere similar? Papageorge, one of the authors of the study refers to “role model effect” and compares the idea to financial investments or education: How much you expect to get out of something determines how much you’re willing to put in. He says if a low-income black boy never sees an adult in his school who looks like him he may draw the conclusion,”‘Hey, college is just not for me’. And then why would you work hard in school?”

That’s not to say the graduation class of every HBCU in the next several years should be filled with education majors, but the study does shed light on the idea that the more young black children are surrounded by positive examples of success, the better chance they will make positive decision for their future. Most importantly, seeing professionals who not only look like them but can relate to their story is the ultimate proof that where you come from doesn’t have to determine where you’re going.

Toya Sharee is a Health Resource Specialist who has a  passion for helping young women build their self-esteem and make well-informed choices about their sexual health. She also advocates for women’s reproductive rights and blogs about  everything from beauty to love and relationships. Follow her on Twitter @TheTrueTSharee or visit her blog, Bullets and Blessings.

The post Does Having A Black Teacher Make A Difference In Our Kids’ Success? appeared first on MadameNoire.

When it comes to Solange’s style, she’s a true chameleon. Of course, she always keeps things classy but her choices jump from neutral palettes to funky, avant-grade-shaped silhouettes to sleek and sexy   fits. Honestly, there’s nothing she won’t try and that’s what we admire most about her personal style – it’s just that, hers.

But the one question we’ve been dying to ask is: where exactly does she shop for her many outfits Well, in a recent interview with InStyle, Solange revealed that she loves online shopping and she’s surprisingly an Ebay kind of gal.

: @j.bilhan

A post shared by Solange (@saintrecords) on Apr 22, 2017 at 6:48pm PDT

“I’m literally on Ebay just searching for Issey Miyake all the time,” she said. “It’s my favorite thing to look for. That’s what my introduction to ebay was actually—trying to find archived Issey pleated pieces and that opened the floodgates to other worlds, but that’s where it started.”

“Issey Miyake has been a huge influence for me, just in terms of the way that they use fashion as architecture and as an art form,” she continued. “I’ve got a solid little collection going and growing.”

@levis

A post shared by Solange (@saintrecords) on Apr 16, 2017 at 12:36pm PDT

Oh, if you’re into archival pieces like too, Solange recommends 1stdibs. “They actually have some incredible Issey Miyake pieces. They are art pieces within themselves that you can build into a collection.”

Thanks, Solo!

The post You’ll Never Guess One Of Solange’s Favorite Places To Shop appeared first on MadameNoire.

There’s been much for the past few years about Rihanna’s trademarked Fenty Beauty ever since she registered it on the sly in 2014 as a cosmetics line.

Well, we’ve got an update. Is it here yet? No. Is it coming? Yes. At a recent Fenty x Puma event in L.A. where Rihanna showed up to shop with fans and sign autographs, a fan asked what highlighter she was wearing, to which she answered, “It’s mine. It’s a secret…. until September.”

“It’s mine, it’s a secret…until September” ✨ @badgalriri is showing off and revealing for the FIRST TIME! Her upcoming #HIGHLIGHTER !!!!!!!!!!!! (Which looks holographic) Last Year one of the #Beauty #Makeup breaking news was the announcement of #FentyBeauty by #Rihanna #ComingSoon #Fall2017 ➡️ SEPTEMBER The model (bottom R pic) is wearing what seems to be one of the first upcoming products by the new brand, a holographic lip color will be sold @Sephora This is super exciting!!!! #BringItOn #Rihanna the Beauty/Makeup world is ready for u! Will keep u updated with more info soon THOUGHTS?! #Trendmood #makeupartist #makeupjunkie #makeupaddict #makeuplover #motd #fashion #instabeauty #beauty #bblogger #bbloggers #beautyblogger #makeup #makeuptalk Video: @rihstore THANK U for this HOT update: @thee_lady_pineapple @oliviasingerr @ylwgemini

A post shared by TRENDMOOD (@trendmood1) on Apr 21, 2017 at 10:37am PDT

September actually sounds about right as she’s been steady releasing her fashion collections during New York Fashion Week. Oh, and another fan who attended the event caught it all on camera, so there’s definitely proof that we’ll all be rushing to get Rihanna’s glow.

Don’t say we didn’t warn you. Rihanna is about to take over the beauty industry, too. We see you Bad Gal Ri Ri.

The post Is This The First Product From Rihanna’s Anticipated Fenty Beauty Line? appeared first on MadameNoire.

Congrats are certainly in order for Elaine Welteroth!

Just last summer we were sharing the news that a then 29-year-old Welteroth had been named editor at Teen Vogue, replacing  replacing the publication’s founding editor-in-chief, Amy Astley. Now, Condé Nast has moved her title up to even more boss-status as Editor-in-Chief of Teen Vogue.

Announced this week, Welteroth will now head the expansion of Teen Vogue’s presence through new consumer experiences and products, according to WWD, with the help of co-brand leaders Marie Suter and Phillip Picardi maintaining the titles creative director and digital editorial director, respectively.

I’ve been waiting a whole week to post this just so I can use this hashtag! #shoesdaytuesday with the white werk boot crew @teenvogue @katiemsapp

A post shared by Elaine Welteroth (@elainewelteroth) on Apr 4, 2017 at 8:13pm PDT

Since coming on board as an editor, Teen Vogue has gone through a huge revamp, expanding its consumer base and focus with politically and socially aware issues regarding people of color, women and other marginalized groups.

☔️Is it spring yet or do I still need to bring this thing to work with me every day?

A post shared by Elaine Welteroth (@elainewelteroth) on Mar 28, 2017 at 4:51pm PDT

“Elaine is incredibly in tune with the Teen Vogue audience and has used that unique insight to engage and connect with her readers on a very personal level,” said Anna Wintour, artistic director of Condé Nast and editor in chief of Vogue. “Over the last year, she has demonstrated a fearless leadership in her pursuit to make Teen Vogue the voice of a new generation, and we look forward to all she will accomplish in her expanded role as Teen Vogue’s new editor in chief.”

The post Elaine Welteroth Promoted To Editor-In-Chief Of ‘Teen Vogue’ appeared first on MadameNoire.

You can now pre-order #STRENGTHOFAWOMAN and get my new single Love Yourself. I can’t wait for you to hear the rest [link in bio]

A post shared by Mary J Blige (@therealmaryjblige) on Mar 30, 2017 at 10:56pm PDT

Ladies and gents, the moment we’ve all been waiting for has arrived: Mary J. Blige’s highly-anticipated new album, Strength of a Woman, is now available.

As the “Queen of Hip-Hop Soul’s” 13th studio album, the newly-released body of work contains 14 songs, including standout singles “Thick of It” and the Kanye West-assisted, “Love Yourself.” In addition to Mr. West, Blige pulled out all the stops with a star-studded guest list of features. There’s newcomers like Quavo of Migos and groovy Montreal-based producer Kaytranda, alongside icons like Missy Elliot and those reaching legendary status like DJ Khaled.

I GOT ONE WIT THE QUEENS OF THIS GAME IM TRULY BLESSED!!! GO GET STRENGTH OF A WOMEN!!! ALBUM OUT NOW @therealmaryjblige @missymisdemeanorelliott @djkhaled

A post shared by QuavoHuncho (@quavohuncho) on Apr 28, 2017 at 8:36am PDT

Strength of a Woman is now available on all streaming services and digital markets everywhere. Take it for an inaugural spin below and share with us your thoughts in the comments.

The post Stream Mary J. Blige’s New Album ‘Strength Of A Woman’ appeared first on MadameNoire.

Recently a victim of threats and bullying, Joy Lane the ex-girlfriend of the recently deceased Steve Stephens is now speaking out about her relationship with the man who committed murder on Facebook Live.  He began the post with a rant indicating that Lane was responsible for what was about to happen. He then approached 74-year-old Robert Godwin Sr. and asked him to say her name before shooting and killing him.

Of course it didn’t take long for the incident to go viral leading many to Google Lane’s name and look for her on Facebook to see exactly who was the woman named in the video. She recently sat down with Inside Edition and discussed dealing with on-line bullying and blame, sharing mutual grief with the Godwin family and her relationship with Stephens before the tragic events of Easter Sunday.

Lane says it’s been difficult seeing her name dominate social media:

“The hashtags Joy Lane, Joy Lane massacre — I don’t even know who Joy Lane is anymore, or how to pick up all the pieces of my world at this moment.”

“I’ve got a lot of negative comments. Some even said he should have killed me.”

She also spoke on living with her name being a part of Godwin’s last words:

“I feel bad … The last thing that he would have said was my name and didn’t know me or why he was saying it. And that’s been difficult.”

Lane said Stephens’ gambling addiction was the reason behind the couple’s recent break up, but says they had discussed getting engaged in the past. She told reporter Les Trent that just days before, everything seemed fine:

“I was in my bedroom and he was downstairs getting ready for work. He said, ‘Hey, babe,’ and I said, ‘Hey,’ and he said, ‘Have a good day,’ and I said, ‘You, too; have a good day.’ ”

Lane says she spoke with Stephens the night before his rampage and he mentioned quitting his job and moving out of state.

In a controversial admission, Lane says she still loves Stephens and although she doesn’t excuse his actions, it’s hard to remember him as a murderer:

“I miss the Steve that I knew, not the Facebook killer.”

“I think of him as a good guy who did something really wrong.”

“I believe Steve loved me probably like no man has ever loved me before.”

Lane also met with two of Godwin’s daughters nearly 48 hours after his death. The family does not blame her for the killing and say that Robert Godwin Sr. always taught forgiveness. Lane says they will continue to support each other in their grief:

“Mr. Godwin didn’t deserve this. His family didn’t deserve this, his children, his grandchildren, his loved ones. They didn’t deserve to feel this type of hurt and pain of missing their loved one.”

You can view a portion of the interview below:

The post “I Miss The Steve That I Knew” Joy Lane Speaks On Relationship With Stephens Before Facebook Live Murder appeared first on MadameNoire.

When twist out is ❤️❤️❤️💃🏾🌈🌞 @hairbywankaya @flawlesshairday products used: edge control gel, oil treatment and shine spray

A post shared by Gabrielle Union-Wade (@gabunion) on Apr 24, 2017 at 9:43am PDT

With summertime arriving, we’re all on the hunt for ways to slay and protect our tresses.

Well, hair chamelon Gabrielle Union, who has been flaunting her natural curls alongside weaves and wigs, has us head over heels in love with her latest hairdo. And we’ve already got our comb, brush and hair oil ready to get the look ourselves.

The Being Mary Jane actress took to Instagram earlier this week, showcasing an intricate twist out, faux mohawk featuring braided bantu knots that her stylist Wankaya created.

Bantu knots x bomb ass twist out and after a few days she pulls it up into a pineapple! #gabrielleunion #hairgrowinghands #healthyhairmatters #naturalhair #naturalhaircare #flawless #onebywankaya #fauxhawk #pineapple

A post shared by Wankaya H. (@hairbywankaya) on Apr 24, 2017 at 10:26am PDT

Union shared that her stylist used the edge control gel, oil treatment and shine spray from her very own Flawless by Gabrielle Union haircare line. On Wankaya’s Instagram account, she pinned Union’s faux mohawk into a high ponytail, demonstrating the style’s versatility.

We’re definitely loving this creative style. Ladies, what are your thoughts?

The post Gabrielle Union’s New ‘Do Is Summer-Approved appeared first on MadameNoire.

We all know Ciara has been serving up nothing but third trimester fierceness as she and her fans anxiously awaited the birth of her second child. Well, wait no more. She and husband NFL player, Russell Wilson both took to social media last night to announce the birth of their new baby girl.

The couple announced the pregnancy in October of last year on Ciara’s birthday. At the time, the “I Bet” singer shared:

“On this special birthday I received an abundance of love from friends and family…and I’m excited to finally share one of the greatest gifts of all that god could give.”

Sienna is also welcomed by big brother, Future Zahir Wilburn whom Ciara had in May 2014 with rapper Future.

In addition to welcoming a newborn, the couple will also celebrate their first wedding anniversary this summer. Ciara recently talked to E! News about making it through the first year of marriage:

“Married life is the best life. It’s definitely life-changing, and you do feel a difference between the stages of being boyfriend and girlfriend to being engaged to actually being married.”

“You feel the definition of what ‘being one’ is, and it’s really cool. Nothing compares to what this feels like.”

Congrats to the Wilson family. We’re looking forward to seeing first pics of Baby Sienna!

The post She’s Here! Ciara and Russell Wilson Welcome Baby Girl appeared first on MadameNoire.

At my day job as a Health Resource Specialist, the part of my day that I take the most pride in is when I get to provide to relief to a couple who have recently found out their pregnant but are panicked because they don’t have health insurance. Anyone who is a parent knows that you’re signing up for a lifetime of anxiety that begins shortly after you see two pink lines staring back at you. When my little “surprise” popped up about three years ago, I instantly began to worry about everything from formula feeding to college savings because the fact is kids cost a whole lot of money. So when expectant parents call the hotline I work at seeking affordable pre-natal care and discover they won’t necessarily have to face millions of dollars in medical bills just to give birth, I’m glad to help…so they can make room for other worries like stretch marks and sleep deprivation.

A new study has found that (surprise) stressing over finances while pregnant isn’t exactly helping your situation and could in fact be harmful to you and your baby’s health. Now even science says that even if you’re not Beyoncé and Jay-Z with a baby that will be born into a trust fund, that doesn’t mean you should let your lack of coins stress you out or the life you’re creating. Researchers at Ohio State University found that women who experienced financial stress during pregnancy had lower weight babies than those who didn’t. Previous research had linked low-income parents with a higher risk of low-birth weight babies. But does low-income directly correlate to low-birth rate or is the solution as simple as not being stressed over your bank account no matter how it’s “set up”? Researchers set out to find the connection in hope that they could help parents cope.

The study asked 138 pregnant women to report their stressors meaning things like financial concerns, stress, depression and anxiety. The women were assessed throughout their pregnancies and again after their babies were born. Moms with the highest level of anxiety about money seemed to be the most at-risk for having babies with low birth weights. What was most interesting however is that the parent’s actual income (or lackthereof) wasn’t exactly what seemed to have the greatest effect on the pregnancy, it was the parents’ perception of their ability to meet their expenses (regardless of their actual financial situation) that had the potential to negatively affect the pregnancy. Meaning that even parents who seemed to have a decent financial situation seemed to have more complicated pregnancies if they were stressed about what they could handle financially and that parents who seemed even worse off seemed to have better pregnancy outcomes if they had a more positive attitude.

Admittedly, now that I have a three-year-old, I find myself wondering how my parents did it all: Catholic school tuition, mortgage in a decent neighborhood in Philly, car notes and groceries. As I find myself buying less and less for myself and saving more and more for my daughter, I have a newfound appreciation for all of the sacrifices they made they my sister and I never noticed and they never made a big deal out of. Now I see why McDonalds was limited to weekends and why my mom never bought the overpriced toys outside of the circus that would be broken by next week. It’s because for parents both wealthy and just making end meets, it doesn’t matter how much money is in your account if you aren’t able to pass on the ability to budget, a healthy work ethic and the insight to invest in your children’s future. Because even if DJ Khaled’s son Asahd’s net worth is more than your whole life and he’s not even a year old, what ironically has the most worth are the values of determination and resilience his father is passing down to him.

In the meanwhile, the study’s principal investigator, Lisa Christian says pregnancy is not time to stress over the “would’ve, could’ve, should’ve”:

“There is no reason to worry about things that are out of your control. Instead, prepare for what you can change and create a financial plan. Reach out to friends and family for help, and find ways to reduce your anxiety like exercising or speaking with a psychiatrist. It is normal to feel financial strain during pregnancy, and there is a wealth of resources available to help.”

In addition, I think the healthiest thing you can do is to focus on being the best parent you can be, no matter what your coins are looking like. The greatest people can come from very humble beginnings. I’m finding for most kids if they’re getting the basics of food, shelter, and a dry diaper, most importantly all they want is your love and time, especially in those early years. Now when you’re dealing with a pre-teen who’s begging for party buses, Playstation and Air Yeezy’s, we’ll talk.

Toya Sharee is a Health Resource Specialist who has a  passion for helping young women build their self-esteem and make well-informed choices about their sexual health. She also advocates for women’s reproductive rights and blogs about  everything from beauty to love and relationships. Follow her on Twitter @TheTrueTSharee or visit her blog, Bullets and Blessings.

The post Too Blessed To Be Stressed: How Your Biggest Worry Is Harming Your Pregnancy appeared first on MadameNoire.

If there’s anything that can make or break my summer, it’s scoring tickets to  a major music festival. But there’s only so much I’m willing to pay (and am able to spend) to sit in the grass in a flower crown and get lost in the experience that is hearing Kendrick Lamar lyrics live. However, Fyre Festival attendees recently learned it costs a whole lot of money to have a really bad time.

Slate magazine recently published a rundown of the “highly-exclusive event” turned hipster ground zero that Twitter had a field day with this past Friday. The festival was advertised as a pseudo-Coachella with “the best in food, art, music, and adventure” taking place on a private island in the Bahamas. Organized by rapper Ja Rule, the concert boasted names like Tyga, Desiigner, Major Lazer, Pusha T, and Blink-182 as scheduled to perform. Models Bella Hadid, Chanel Iman and Hailey Baldwin even urged their fans through social media to purchase tickets to event which were sold at prices ranging from $1500 to a whopping $12,000. But concert-goers arrived to anything but a good time that included inclement weather, subpar accommodations and reports of violence, theft and even a feral dog or two.

Twitter erupted as attendees posted pictures of their luxury accommodations which more resembled a disaster relief site complete with a “cheese sandwich” gourmet dinner and emergency tents:

The dinner that @fyrefestival promised us was catered by Steven Starr is literally bread, cheese, and salad with dressing. #fyrefestival pic.twitter.com/I8d0UlSNbd

— Tr3vor (@trev4president) April 28, 2017

That's right folks for just $10k, you too can have the "refugee fleeing war torn region" treatment at #fyrefestival pic.twitter.com/RqYzGq0Yg5

— 👌🏻Garrett Garner🎺 (@garrettgarner12) April 28, 2017

And of course users were quick to mock the idea of wealthy millennials who would pay such exorbitant prices for such an experience in the first place:

If you spent up to $12k to attend #fyrefestival, you deserve everything you get for attending a festival where Blink-182 was the headliner.

— Mr. Pickles (@AskMrPickles) April 28, 2017

And the rich kids at #fyrefestival will look up shout, "Save us!"

And I will look down and whisper, "Pull yourself up by your bootstraps."

— rebound @ NAH (@tehrebound) April 28, 2017

How many times has "Do you know who I am?" been screamed in the face of a very frustrated and confused Bahamian? #fyrefestival

— Monty Burns, III (@CMontyBurnsIII) April 28, 2017

While reports of hunger, dehydration and social media influencers stranded at the airport and demanding refunds emerged, and jokes featuring Joanne The Scammer ran rampant on Twitter, Fyre Festival released an official statement in an attempt to do some damage control:

“Due to circumstances out of our control, the physical infrastructure was not in place on time and we are unable to fulfill on that vision safely and enjoyably for our guests.”

Even Ja Rule eventually addressed what went wrong…well sort of:

pic.twitter.com/KuJYxfsQJ4

— Ja Rule (@Ruleyork) April 28, 2017

In an exclusive interview with Rolling Stone, entrepreneur Billy McFarland who partnered with Ja Rule on the venture blames a bad storm for the festival fail and states that he and other organizers were “a bit naive” and ignored red flags that were present since the event’s creation:

“The Exumas didn’t have a really great infrastructure – there wasn’t a great way to get guests in here — we were a little bit ambitious. There wasn’t water or sewage. It was almost like we tried building a city out of nothing and it took almost all of our personal resources to make this happen, and everything we had, to make this festival go on. We thought we were ready and built two different festival sites.”

“We were on a rush job to fix everything and guests were arriving and that caused check-in to be delayed. We were overwhelmed and just didn’t have the foresight to solve all these problems.”

On Saturday organizers of the event posted an additional statement that promised all attendees would be refunded their money and invited back next year:

“All festival goers this year will be refunded in full. We will be working on refunds over the next few days and will be in touch directly with guests with more details.”

“Also, all guests from this year will have free VIP passes to next year’s festival.”

I’ll pass. Fyre Festival seems a little too “lit” for my taste. If anything, I will never, ever complain about shelling out $100 to see Lauryn Hill show up four hours late to a concert again.

The post Is Ja Rule To Blame For The Crash And Burn Of Fyre Festival? appeared first on MadameNoire.

Singer Ne-Yo recently showed that he doesn’t just have love for the ladies, but the crooner loves the kids too. VIBE reports the “She Knows” singer recently invested $2.3 million into a coding facility named Holberton School.

The school will provide an opportunity for youth from underprivileged communities to pursue a career in coding, promising a tuition-free education until students lands careers in their prospective fields. Holberton School doesn’t request payment until after that student is employed, and at that point will require 17 percent of said student’s salary during their first three years of employment.

It shouldn’t be too hard for Holberton students to land gigs after graduation. Holberton is an IRL school that offers a two-year program, instead of a multi-week bootcamp, as well as mentors from companies like Google, LinkedIn, Uber and Instagram. The school also aims to be as diverse as possible in its selection process already boasting a class that is 43% female and 53% people of color.

Ne-Yo, who is a father to three, is all for the program and putting the money up to prove it. He recently spoke to Tech Crunch to talk about his investment:

“Everybody knows that tech and all these things are the wave of the future.”

“I just love the fact of what they’re doing with the school — that they’re making it easier for underrepresented people in the world of tech. They’re giving them a platform and access to this knowledge that they probably wouldn’t get otherwise. I think that’s one of the coolest things about this whole situation.”

Ne-Yo also expressed that he plans to do more than write a check:

“I’m definitely going to be hands on. I don’t know if i’m going to do every day because there’s this little music career thing that i’ve got going on, so there’s that but i’m definitely going to be hands on.”

“This is not, ‘oh, let me attach my name to something.’ This is something that I’m genuinely passionate about.”

“You know, diversifying the tech world. Tech is changing the world by the second so it makes sense to get the people that live in the world to be part of this thing that’s changing it, as opposed to just this one group of people.”

We’re sure Ne-Yo and Holberton will make an awesome duet and a difference in the lives of some promising youth.

The post Ne-Yo Invests Into Tech School And Gives Kids The Opportunity To Learn Coding appeared first on MadameNoire.

It’s safe to say that we’re all missing former First Lady Michelle Obama. Many were so impressed with her deep dedication to education, children’s health and veterans and crossing their fingers that she may take up a full-fledge career in politics.

But even with the highest approval ratings (64 percent) among fellow former first ladies and even scoring higher (58 percent) than Barack during their exit, she’s firm in her opposing answer.

During her first public speaking engagement since leaving office in January, Mrs. Obama explained that she would continue her passions but without taking up politics as an actual career, as reported by The Orlando Sentinel.

“It’s all well and good until you start running, and then the knives come out,” she said at the American Institute of Artist’s annual conference in Orlando. “Politics is tough, and it’s hard on a family.”

During their eight years in office, Malia and Sasha Obama grew up in the middle of the public eye, garnerning unwanted criticism from political pundits and their followers. Obama went on to explain that since their exit, Sasha and Malia both now live “normal” lives and they want to keep it that as a family. “I wouldn’t ask my children to do this again because, when you run for higher office, it’s not just you, it’s your whole family.” she added.

We feel you Michelle, family first. But how dope would it be to see Mrs. Obama rule?

The post Michelle Obama Reveals Why She’ll Never Run For Office appeared first on MadameNoire.